Gawd..I just sneezed and my blouse and my right arm are covered with my sneeze droplets..heh..disgusting fact of the night. My mum had been pestering me to go to the doctor but I refused. Coz I hate to call in sick in the morning, my covering officer knows next to nothing about counselling...and....I hate to be my mother's bellgirl.
Anyway, want to give a shoutout to mariah for the treat yesterday and I really really appreciate it even though I thought that she may be a tad bit mad I was not able to finish the food. Seriously, it was a lot and even though I did not feel full, my joints were aching and my jaw too making every bite painful after awhile coz of the flu and the fever I had for the past few nights I guess. Yup, surprisingly....i did not feel full. Maybe my body is busy churning phlegm and snorts that it forgot to signal the 'im way past hungry' tell tale signs. But dont worry Mariah..(Shakira sounds a bit drab lah..)...I shall promise you a treat to Breeks...my choice of food. Yum....pasta...yum..............
Okay, so Mariah's claim that this flu is due to well...not seeing D..err..that's not true! I err..of course I can survive not seeing for him..err..one month! Hell, do I have to remind myself that. Yes, you dont have to remind me too that D is bloody well married so he's off limit but even if he's not, chances are I wont even consider him as more than friend. Well, he has tattoos, one is those big spiral tribal thing round his arm and a a stylised cross at the nape of his neck (which....I thought was sexy..heh..), he smokes and drinks I suppose since he does say he go clubbing at times..and what else? OH..and freaking vain! What the hell...Cant stand guys who think the world revolves around their pretty little asses for being so darn good looking. One more of that 'im so handsome....im more handsome than him....', I swear Im gonna puke for real infront of him. He knows I hate it when he self praise himself..and unfortunately, does it even MORE after that.
So he broke all the self implied rules I have on love or the potential boyfriend unless of course Im into a fast and furious no holds barred kind of relationship. Im just basically shy with guys in general and I am still shy with him and I swear most of the time he doesnt understand what Im mumbling about but is nice enough not to tell it in my face. You know..he's like this totally different person when he's talking to me (besides the egoistic side of him..) compared to the rest of my colleagues. So I...kinda trusted him when he said he misses me..twice. The first time round, my ex partner asked and he said yah he was gonna miss me..and from the corner of my eye, could see that he was looking at me for some kind of response and the second time, D last day...he said to my face. It was totally sweet but I didnt trust him either coz..pfft...guys..you know...they dont mean things that easily or maybe he did but the next thing, he is sure to forget. But then, you do know also Im talking about this on friendship terms. Still, I bet with the lack of my presence, when I am back later he will probably be back to his previous mode where he isn't that close to me such as being excited and smiley when he sees me or the fearless side of him teaching me how to boss around a difficult covering officer. Yah, why dont YOU show your fearless side to that evil step 'sister' of yours so she'll stop taking free rides in your van for an up close and personal session with you..Wooh! Someone's got a crush from an auntie!
Yup, make things difficult for rahayu lah...and now make rahayu sick. Woopee. Bloody air con repairmen failed to do their job for the two freaky air conditioners in my room. Doesnt matter if the degree celcius is set at 20 or 28. I felt like I was holidaying in the north pole inside some igloo. Made my condition worse off that I think most of the patients who came for counselling last Saturday at my room felt like they carried back with them not only the results of their children's eye tests but my disease.
Sorry to these people. And....on a last note, since tomorrow is Monday and to count my blessings, I am happy my friend FINALLy transferred the money for the project I did for her. And I thought I was a gone case for this week for my lack of money. I failed miserably this month coz I overestimated and overspent. My plan B almost didnt work out which set me panicking and I failed to curb my expenses as if I was too eager to prove to myself that I dont have to always deprive myself.
It is a lesson learnt indeed and I promise, this time round with my next paycheck, I must strike a balance. As delicate the balance can be, whatever I do must not compromise my family's expenditures. I dont know how am I gonna cope with it or achieve back the same strength of willpower I had previously before I succumbed to using more than what I should spend on myself with the thought that Im gonna get a bit more extra. Okay since I have already gotten most of what I wanted last month, this month I should be more careful and learn to prioritise. Oh, and then finally get my savings going while at the same time clearing my loan debt slowly but surely.
Wish me luck...
Anyway, want to give a shoutout to mariah for the treat yesterday and I really really appreciate it even though I thought that she may be a tad bit mad I was not able to finish the food. Seriously, it was a lot and even though I did not feel full, my joints were aching and my jaw too making every bite painful after awhile coz of the flu and the fever I had for the past few nights I guess. Yup, surprisingly....i did not feel full. Maybe my body is busy churning phlegm and snorts that it forgot to signal the 'im way past hungry' tell tale signs. But dont worry Mariah..(Shakira sounds a bit drab lah..)...I shall promise you a treat to Breeks...my choice of food. Yum....pasta...yum..............
Okay, so Mariah's claim that this flu is due to well...not seeing D..err..that's not true! I err..of course I can survive not seeing for him..err..one month! Hell, do I have to remind myself that. Yes, you dont have to remind me too that D is bloody well married so he's off limit but even if he's not, chances are I wont even consider him as more than friend. Well, he has tattoos, one is those big spiral tribal thing round his arm and a a stylised cross at the nape of his neck (which....I thought was sexy..heh..), he smokes and drinks I suppose since he does say he go clubbing at times..and what else? OH..and freaking vain! What the hell...Cant stand guys who think the world revolves around their pretty little asses for being so darn good looking. One more of that 'im so handsome....im more handsome than him....', I swear Im gonna puke for real infront of him. He knows I hate it when he self praise himself..and unfortunately, does it even MORE after that.
So he broke all the self implied rules I have on love or the potential boyfriend unless of course Im into a fast and furious no holds barred kind of relationship. Im just basically shy with guys in general and I am still shy with him and I swear most of the time he doesnt understand what Im mumbling about but is nice enough not to tell it in my face. You know..he's like this totally different person when he's talking to me (besides the egoistic side of him..) compared to the rest of my colleagues. So I...kinda trusted him when he said he misses me..twice. The first time round, my ex partner asked and he said yah he was gonna miss me..and from the corner of my eye, could see that he was looking at me for some kind of response and the second time, D last day...he said to my face. It was totally sweet but I didnt trust him either coz..pfft...guys..you know...they dont mean things that easily or maybe he did but the next thing, he is sure to forget. But then, you do know also Im talking about this on friendship terms. Still, I bet with the lack of my presence, when I am back later he will probably be back to his previous mode where he isn't that close to me such as being excited and smiley when he sees me or the fearless side of him teaching me how to boss around a difficult covering officer. Yah, why dont YOU show your fearless side to that evil step 'sister' of yours so she'll stop taking free rides in your van for an up close and personal session with you..Wooh! Someone's got a crush from an auntie!
Yup, make things difficult for rahayu lah...and now make rahayu sick. Woopee. Bloody air con repairmen failed to do their job for the two freaky air conditioners in my room. Doesnt matter if the degree celcius is set at 20 or 28. I felt like I was holidaying in the north pole inside some igloo. Made my condition worse off that I think most of the patients who came for counselling last Saturday at my room felt like they carried back with them not only the results of their children's eye tests but my disease.
Sorry to these people. And....on a last note, since tomorrow is Monday and to count my blessings, I am happy my friend FINALLy transferred the money for the project I did for her. And I thought I was a gone case for this week for my lack of money. I failed miserably this month coz I overestimated and overspent. My plan B almost didnt work out which set me panicking and I failed to curb my expenses as if I was too eager to prove to myself that I dont have to always deprive myself.
It is a lesson learnt indeed and I promise, this time round with my next paycheck, I must strike a balance. As delicate the balance can be, whatever I do must not compromise my family's expenditures. I dont know how am I gonna cope with it or achieve back the same strength of willpower I had previously before I succumbed to using more than what I should spend on myself with the thought that Im gonna get a bit more extra. Okay since I have already gotten most of what I wanted last month, this month I should be more careful and learn to prioritise. Oh, and then finally get my savings going while at the same time clearing my loan debt slowly but surely.
Wish me luck...
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