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Showing posts from May, 2006

Im So Used

Gawd..I hate to receive sms-es or short messages via my handphone from my colleagues. ACtually, it's more for my current partner in the team. I can't believe everytime she sms-es me, she's always sounding bossy like instructing to do stuffs for her or bring stuffs for her like Im her farking secretary. Please lah, get ur life organized can? I know u're the leader in my team (though rarely acts as one) but it doesnt give you the authority to keep instructing me to do stuffs for u due to ur own carelessness? And wat makes you think that Im always agreeable to what you want me to do? It's always like 'Ayu, can you something something for me tonight, thank you' or 'Ayu, can you bring something something for me tomorrow, thank you' and the last straw which I didn't respond coz I felt was so redundant was 'Ayu, can you email me the schedule by tonight?' Like what the hell, you think I got so much time to go type out the addresses of the school…

So Tired

Actuallie, this was written days ago but blogger wasn't working that time. So, come to think of it, I forgot what it was about..hehe..

Well...I haven't been writing for awhile eh? I have been super tired each day and I don't know if that is because I am mentally or physically drained. But sometimes, maybe it's a good thing coz i turn in bed earlier (by that I mean before 1 or 2am in the morning). I guess it's the work too...I hate it when I have to go screening in a school with a huge enrolment which takes up two or more weeks. But what to do...it's not as if I can pick and choose the schools to go to. What I get is basically what I have to do..Sigh...Anyhow, not one to let myself down easily, I just try to give my best and not think about it too much and jz do it and let the day carries itself out till the end. Uhm..it helps a tad bit lah when I emerge myself in my work and then like eh? The time passed by so quickly already ah?


Oh, and maybe coz i havent exactl…

Ever Complaining

Well...I haven't been writing for awhile eh? I have been super tired each day and I don't know if that is because I am mentally or physically drained. But sometimes, maybe it's a good thing coz i turn in bed earlier (by that I mean before 1 or 2am in the morning). I guess it's the work too...I hate it when I have to go screening in a school with a huge enrolment which takes up two or more weeks. But what to do...it's not as if I can pick and choose the schools to go to. What I get is basically what I have to do..Sigh...Anyhow, not one to let myself down easily, I just try to give my best and not think about it too much and jz do it and let the day carries itself out till the end. Uhm..it helps a tad bit lah when I emerge myself in my work and then like eh? The time passed by so quickly already ah?


Oh, and maybe coz i havent exactly eaten regularly everyday. No, in case you think this is my latest diet craze, I wanna clarify with you, I have never been on a diet. I t…

First Progress

Hey..i looked through the archives of my blog of my first attempts at losing weight. Sadly, I didn't write about losing that first kg but about losing yet another 0.5 kg. What the heck..anyway, it was rather interesting reading about how i got the wake up call to do something about my weight.

Here are some excerpts:


"Stupid Mirrored Room"

I don't know whether am I getting fatter or wat. I probably wouldn't care as long as I don't look all frumpy and stuffs. but I seemed to be given rooms for my vision screenings in schools that HAVE mirrors. Although I like looking at myself, but not how I look when I sit down. So err...jelly like!!! Then my new colleague, though she's not exactly thin either, she knows how to dress well. And it's like after a guy drops her ( I mean, they're jerks too..so who cares), someone in line is always waiting for her. And her boyfriend is getting thinner and thinner...and get this...the last one was an army personnel. So he&#…

Stupid

yesterday was a stupid stupid day...if they wanna make my life miserable, they certainly had done their job. They'll get what they deserve! You wanna put me down, fine....we'll see who gets the last laugh.

It's Hard

Haiz..why can't i..for once...not have any health probs in regards to the sensitivity of my skin? It's like practically every month surely one part or two of my body involving the skin will have some kind of problem. Just the beginning this year I have been suffering in silence like tolerating my severely burnt armpits due ONE time usage of deodorant and some other parts also which give me severe discomfort especially when Im hot and sweaty. Oh and last month too I had these 1 cent sized marks appearing mysteriously on my thighs and my lower abs as if they had been stubbed with a cigarette butt at random. And Im not even done yet with my descriptions. Oh, jz as the scars are slowly healing after months of discomfort, yet another one appears. Again, due to one time use of a product and this time it is a branded shampoo of which its ONE time use again, give me great discomfort and a brand new kind of skin ailment. My scalp, on the part above the hairline, have patches like as if…

Mother's Day

okay this entry is a tad bit late but nevertheless wanna wish all mothers a happy mother's day! I didn't plan to do anything for my mum coz despite my mum's particular neurotic habit of upkeeping personal hygiene, she's not that big on celebrations. Infact, she is easily satisfied like she jz wanted two stick of sotong heads from old chang kee and strangely, she didnt ask for her fav snacks which is Mamee. Yeah, that snack with the blue cookie monster lookalike on the packaging with the 'everlasting' smile. The one that we had indulged in once upon a time in our lives but my mum, her indulgence started last year when she is past her mid forties. Oh, but she did ask for something else. Twenty ripe tomatoes from the nearby cold storage to make tomato juice in order to retain her health..and her..uhm..youthfulness. Usually, I'll be like...sighz.....thinking about carrying the load of tomatoes plus other stuffs that are just aplenty. But today, I didnt really f…

STuffs

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hey...

today was quite a fun day..az usual..i was 'clowning' around but it wasn't intentionally done. Go figure. narh, sometimes you dont have to try so hard but jz be ur usual self. It comes with self confidence. If you feel confident about urself, it's like the world revolves around ur buffered fingertips.


My partner did an amazing thing the other time and I could not thank her enough. Even though...uhm..it was sorta an escape for her over some matters which I knew she loathed to do but heck, she did me a huge favour without me asking and I thought I owed her some too. My mum, who is forever busie in her own terms only, which resulted me fetching my dad from the hospital at the last minute, thought that I should give her something in return. She wanted me to give her a huge box of chocolates and had it wrapped up. Well..since she didnt give me the money, and also knowing that my colleague ain't big on people giving her stuffs, i just bought her this row of ferrero …

Ugly Days

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hey..you know what? I jz realised that it has been ages since I last updated you about my progess in terms of being..well..slimmer..hehe. I can tell you that the progress has been good. Let me see if I can backtrack a bit and dig out the blog post i wrote about the very first kg i ever lost. Forget about the kgs I gained back few months later..hehe. But it marked the initial attempts of mine to lose weight. I would say that it wasnt easy in a whole big way. The temptations were sky high. But if you wanna lose weight, and you stay focus, it actually makes you feel stronger especially when you look at ur weight and see how it keep on falling and falling. Then all the efforts you put in, the hard work, the sweat..makes it all worth it coz you know what? It can only mean one thing...shopping for nicer clothes and bigger confidence! So I tell ya..shake off ur worries and ur laziness! If for years, you havent been exercising or eating healthily, worse...thinking that the weight will never c…

sitis housewarming!

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Voting!

what the hell...bad freakin week. every time i tell myself that tomorrow will be a better day..something is sure to happen. i know my tradition of blog writing is that i like to just let it all loose and swear..curse..whatever...to sort of let go of all the anger that I am feeling inside. But now, i seriously dont feel like writing about the things that let me down. I dont even know where to start. And to top it up, I am slightly less concerned about my diet now. For example snacking like no people's business.

but today, when I am not working..(wa hoo!!), it actually got better! take this down..'rahayu had a good day on the 6th of may!' coz im in better control now. I vacuumed the house up..picked up the dirty laundry in my room...washed my jeans and pants...threw the rubbish away in my room...wiped my dressing table..charged my mp3 player..rearranged my wardrobe...went to get breakfast and grocery shopped...had better control over food ( like no old chang kee!!) and ate …

Bad Week

i'm really having a bad week. To top it off....I had to do a farking report on why i was late for reporting to work at some poly which i was supposed to do a coverage. I had been warned by my colleague to try to turn up early for that poly attachment as now they are tracking what time we open up the system. Ever since the arrival of the new supervisor, he had been controlling and revising everything to a T and had seriously been putting his previous managerial skills to good use...torturing everyone, that is. And to think my second head in charge, had been welcoming the new changes with open arms. Obviously she was blind lah...the changes might drastically whip up the system into a communist country..but the people are the ones suffering. Like what the fark, we are the ones who have to go out to travel and do the screening...and the schedule for this month was planned so farking tightly that we could hardly breathe before the next session. Each session we had to screen almost thir…

Everyday

Since I got mere minutes to write..and this being the beginning of a new month (and new bank balances thanks to govt contributions)...I think I shall come up with this song lyrics.


nb:technically, they're not but you can like sing or hum along to it if you want


Everyday I aim to.... wake up with a brand new confidence be punctual for work be prepared early for work look fashionably good moisturise at least twice eat healthily and in moderation exercise at least ten min on stepper walk and stand with the right posture be nice to my family (hard but worth a try) spend time on my designing hobbies organize my time well watch my expenditures teach my brother his homework not bring myself down not to be majorly irritated by mum's instructions wash my face at night write in my diary online or offline charge my handphone and mp3 player drink at least two bottles of water do a kind deed not put on a sour face plan my online shop layout cut and paste magz and newspaper articles learn some new facts plan my e mag…