Monday, February 11, 2019

Light to Night Festival 2019

This is a free festival by the National Gallery Singapore around the City Hall area which you should go. I went for both events which was the Singapore Art Week and the SG Bicentennial of which the latter is currently on-going. Honestly, the Art Week one was more happening but I think some of the exhibits along the pavement are still around and they're totally instagram worthy.

For now if you go, you will get to see projections on the facades of the National Gallery in the theme of SG Bicentennial. 

I think the highlight was the one Kumar, a local and famous comedian and cross dresser, did his 45 minute stand up comedy routine and there were so many laugh out loud moments literally every few seconds, haha. He was that good. All this mostly based on his interactions and observations in Singapore. Of course he poked fun at the different nationalities besides just Singaporeans and earlier at one point, I felt I was also targeted for being that 38 year single woman, haha. No, it's not because I am picky...or am I? haha..

For the SG Bicentennial, the Friday show at 10.00 featured Hirzi, another local youtuber, writer and director, who was also funny and did a comedy roast of the founding fathers of Singapore. His jokes on Sir Stamford Raffles, who got roasted the most, were funny but true though. I strangely agreed what he had to say about it such as giving credit to those people who came to explore before him but yet Stamford Raffles got the honour of being the founder.

For the food, I enjoyed having the Meatball in a Bucket, where they put in meatballs with some mashed potato and fries in a small plastic bucket, all for $10.

For the SAW, these were found along the the various spots of the City Hall area.

Enjoy the pics below!

This was not part of the festival, obviously lols, but I remembered taking a picture here as well around 2010 I think and that was so long ago. I wanted to recreate the look but was not brave enough to do the 'point to something' look. I thought this was well taken and something like an OOTD, haha.

Monday, February 04, 2019

My Delusional Self

I know this is a weird way of starting this post but sometimes, I feel like I am delusional. Honestly, January was already rough in terms of money but it wasn't all bad because I got some financial help too. And it was also a crazy month as our office had to move and there were numerous times we had to pack things and we were talking years and years of cluttered things. But in the end, we managed to do so and even after moving in to the new office, we had to do the reverse which was unpacking. Luckily, we all managed to work together fast enough to store all the things. Yet it was still pretty cray cray because I had to go up and down the two levels to hand carry many things as well. 

Now I didn't get delusional over this. I felt I was delusional because part of the move included moving our IT equipments such as the laptops, computers and printers. So the IT guy aka Mr Work Gym guy was part of the group that helped to dismantle and the assemble at our new workstations. I don't know what overcame me but I often caught myself wanting to get his attention and take sneak peeks at what he was doing.

Sidetracking a bit, it took them awhile to assemble mine so I did it myself :) But it was tiring and it took me almost 20 minutes to figure it out, lol.

Anyway, I don't know how true this gut feeling is but I think he's older than the rest of them from his looks and style. He was also the quietest yet most polite like you know this guy hardly speaks. I have not confirmed if he was married by looking at his ring finger such as the other one which I happened to glance at when he was at my workstation. He had never attended to me before to be able for me to confirm but despite that, I felt I was a little friendly to him with my Hello greetings, hehe...but he still greeted back though I could tell like he didn't expect it. So that Friday, when he was walking towards my table before turning the aisle, I told myself do NOT get delusional and do NOT catch his attention unnecessarily. So when I saw him walking towards my table before turning the corner, I didn't look at him.

But I felt bad

I kinda chided myself and then when the next opportunity came and he walked that same aisle again towards me, I just looked up towards his direction when I was writing something and he smiled at me...argh..... so I smiled back and said Hello.

So now I feel less as a creep because he initiated first, hehe.

And not just that, I thought that was so sweet as like I said before, he never quite attended to me and even if he did, it was very quick diagnosis and not part of what he was supposed to be there doing. He must be now thinking this girl is so delusional  friendly.

Even with me now fanning over his attention, I don't want to get my hopes too high. It's nice to have the attention of guys for once because honestly, I don't have any guy friends. Ok maybe like one where the last time I talked to was at a friend's wedding last year. I am also not keen in pursuing a relationship but I am girl and I do have moments where I am crushing hard on guys but all this time,   it's always that guy from Sunday's gym so I need a breath of fresh air, lol!

But I don't want to appear so enthusiastic such as fawning over him unnecessarily and trying to catch his attention. I just want to act normal when he is around because I don't want to be my delusional self thinking that he's into me. I still want to be nice to him and the rest of the IT guys because we need them, obviously, haha..and they're nice and friendly people too despite their work. I know it's tough because I took a long time just to re install back my computer and there were many computers that they had to do that day. Not only that, they are coming back on Monday to connect our computers to the network printers and I hope IT guy makes an appearance too..eek! 

Please act normal, Rahayu...( ^ ^)

Saturday, January 26, 2019

Following The 10 Year Challenge

So there was this viral thing going on where people were posting the 10 year challenge where they would show pics of them ten years ago and now. I don't know how it started but it seemed interesting. Don't have to do any of those acrobatic or dangerous moves like the moving car dance thing. That was stupid.

Anyway, in a blink of an eye, 10 years would have passed and the greatest shocker would be when we thought we looked the same as we did back then but reality is, we don't, haha. Sure some people may be luckier as in they look even better than they were 10 years ago. Age can be kind to many but can be cruel too, haha. Like my thinning hair. I've always had a love-hate relationship with my hair because it is constantly all over the place and messy. When I kept my hair longer most times, it would look voluminous but messy. Yet now, it is a different story. Looked flat and shapeless. So I figured that maybe it's better being kept shorter so less obvious that my hair isn't that voluminous anymore, haha.

I have learnt to embrace it, thick back then and thinner now, haha. I wish I am talking about my weight but alas, I am not.

Face shape wise, it looked like it's pretty much the same as compared to 10 years ago but of course, I looked older, but it hasn't been that way until recently. Someone said the same thing too that I looked the same, haha, but honestly it could be I have been working out quite a lot lately up to 3 - 4 times a week. I just enjoy working out at the gym and going for fitness classes not because I 'die die' want to lose weight for vanity. It's just for health like I want to be healthier. If I change physically for the better, then it's good too but it's not my main priority.

Anyway, before I go off tangent, some things still don't change. Like being broke towards barely two weeks after pay day and not having enough savings. Or if I manage to save some money, it goes south pretty quickly and I am not even a spendthrift in the beginning. And then being self conscious such as making myself think that I don't look as attractive as these girls around me so no way, guys will pay any attention to me. I don't crave for their attention but sometimes I wonder if I am ever attractive to them, haha. It's a silly thought because every girl is different and it starts from loving yourself first. 

At times, being clueless in life and finding the lack of meaning. But after yesterday's hilarious session at the National Gallery with Kumar's stand up comedy, he ended off by letting us know that every one of us has a purpose in life, that's why we're being put on east and to always remember to be grateful. Life isn't always rosy and most times, I just think my existence is quite unnecessary because I am not making the best use of my time here and just skating by.

But looking back, I don't want to do another 10 year challenge and then thinking about how I have not achieved anything in life. Sure I have done other things within the current 10 years like continuing with my studies and getting a diploma but I also hope that within the next 10 years, I am able to level up by getting a degree. And then I also hope I can finally amass an amount of wealth not to feel rich but rather, to feel safe that I don't have to worry about being financially strapped and also to be able to travel to some of my dream destinations.

2019 was off to a rough start but there are also some high moments. Let us all achieve to strive more in life because life is short and you'll never know when that right to live will be taken away from us. So write down things you want to achieve in life and live a life with a meaning and purpose :)

Monday, January 21, 2019

Rocky & Eventful Start to 2019

So about three weeks have passed since we did the countdown for the New Year. And how has things been going? Well, I should say that there was some joy, new discoveries, sickness and there were tears shed as well. It's quite a roller coaster ride of emotions but nevertheless, it's the life experiences that shape us.

For me, I have this annoying sore eye thing going on and off since last week. And now it's back on. There's a little sore underneath the eye lid that is causing the irritation and even though it's a little uncomfortable and teary at times, my vision isn't that affected. Other than that, I am also trying to be a little cautious on spending though based on past experiences, this may be quite a futile effort. But I don't know, perhaps things will be slightly different this year? Since I am no longer the sole breadwinner of my family. My brother is now working full time but he is not paying the bills yet. I am. So maybe, I am technically still a breadwinner?'s just this time I have a little income from him and he is giving me a higher amount than he usually did when he worked part time or serving the army. That will help to provide a little relief for me for say, about a week. I may want to save a little portion of it like I did last month but as things can get financially tight at times, I see how it goes.

Speaking of finances, I did some stupid mistakes in the past financially because I was desperate and it seemed like the easy way out. It didn't involve loansharks, thankfully, because that would be even more stupid. But nevertheless, it was and still is, pretty bad and I am determined to have it gone by this year. Someone else decided to help me and this was something totally unexpected but very big hearted. I don't know what else to do and so this was a very welcome gesture for me.

Health wise, I am back to going for fitness classes after work and kicked off with Zumba last Tuesday. And then I went for K-Kardio and yay, it was the same trainer as last month! Since now Thursday class for HIIT has been shifted to Monday, I can now attend every K Kardio class, yay! It's such a popular class as you can see from the turn out below. 

Photo Credit:
Anyway, life is indeed a roller coaster. Tears shed from arguments and for someone who seldom cry, this is big. But when things upset me that much, I can't help but be overwhelmed with emotions. 

Amidst the tears, there were some happiness too. Sometimes things don't always turn out how we expected but there would be a silver lining. We didn't get to cycle because it was about to rain and it did, very heavily. Also because, we didn't manage to unlock the bicycles as they were not in good working condition. 

Disappointed but instead, we headed to a new burger place and we enjoyed our burgers, shakes and fries. No exercise? Why not just bring it up a notch by eating at Fat Burger, haha!

I hope you don't get discouraged if things don't work out for you at the beginning of 2019. We still are not done with January and we have 11 more months to go. So chin up and hope for better days ahead :))

Tuesday, January 01, 2019

Happy New Year 2019! Hope & Faith As My Central Theme

Happy New Year, everyone! A new year means having the whole year again to face life's challenges, victories, learning new things, letting go and many other things in between. My 2018 was the same, nothing out of the ordinary. However, the people around me, especially those that were close to me, they experienced many happy or joyous occasions and I was thrilled that they let me join in with the celebrations. For example, a good friend's wedding, my brother's coming out of the army parade,  a friend's son's first birthday and an open house held by a ex colleague from my workplace from more than 10 years ago.

On a personal note, I didn't manage to achieve what I wanted in life and basically all I tried to do was trying to survive each and every day from life's challenges. Financial difficulties, dealing with a manager who micro manages everything and don't trust my work and a mum who also micro manages my life. My social life is still as awkward as ever and I still don't to make legit guy friends and sometimes I think there is truly something wrong with me. 

But on a more positive note, I am much healthier and I didn't see the doctor at all last year. I have been very committed in my workout routines and lately, I have also been getting into the routine of intermittent fasting which mean that I don't eat any food for a number of hours except to drink water. 

Despite me at times beating myself with such negative thoughts, as always, I try to snap out of it quickly and to have faith that things will work out. Indeed it does at times and I think that is how I manage to survive and all, when facing life's challenge. I don't try to dwell on it. I do my best and if I fall behind, I try to catch up even if I have few hours of sleep if it's going to help me get back on track. I can always sleep a few more hours later.

Earlier this morning, I watched the Ellen Degeneres special where she did a Stand Up Show after 15 years simply because she had missed doing it after helming her award winning and successful talk show for many years. She talked about her initial struggles coping with her losses in life and how many others got affected as well by her decisions to do the right things. And how the challenges that she faced in life, she overcome them by not losing the hope and faith within herself,  which somehow managed to get her out of difficult situations. At many points in life, just when she thought she finally experienced success, she got pushed down and this happened multiple times. 

But she just didn't give up. She didn't let the circumstances in her way. In fact, she rose above them to becoming one of the most loved and respected celebrities in Hollywood.

I suppose that the theme for me this year is 'Hope and Faith' because personally, this had also helped me get through life's challenges for 2019.

Tuesday, December 25, 2018

Christmas Wonderland 2018 at Gardens by the Bay

Merry Christmas! I had to start off this blog post with the cute Santa log cake from Coffee Bean even though we actually ate them the night before, haha. 

Anyway, for a few years now, we have been going to the Christmas Wonderland held at the Gardens by the Bay. The event just got bigger and bigger and we remembered the first time they had such an event, it was pretty low key and also free. But now they have added stalls and turned Gardens by the Bay like a mini Christmas Village. And yes, this time we had to pay like how we did for the couple of years I think. 

Click here for more details and the ticket pricing for the Christmas Wonderland. It's on until December 26th so if you read this post today, or even tomorrow, there is still time.

The highlight was of course the dancing 'trees' where the Supertrees would display dancing lights to the rhythm of popular Christmas songs. Last two years, they had been playing Mariah Carey's 'All I want for Christmas is You' and Ariana Grande's 'Santa Tell Me' but this year round, they played more classier version of Christmas songs with the exception of one by Michael Buble. I got a little bored because I didn't know most of these songs, haha. But perhaps those who actually celebrate Christmas may find these tunes more familiar and homely feeling.

Another highlight was the hourly rain of 'Snow' which was basically fake snow made out of foam coming out from several machines. But now, instead of crowding inside the tower, the machines were placed outside at several spots so we didn't have to squeeze ourselves with the crowd inside to enjoy the fake snow on our hair and taking pictures as though we were really basking in the snow, haha.

There were also several paid events inside but like how one person we overhead commented, everything must pay, we didn't have to subject ourselves to forking out money every now and then. Okay, maybe that one time I paid $10 for some overpriced Nachos and mere sprinkles of sauce on pre packaged chicken pops. 

Anyway, it was still interesting to walk around taking many pics and speaking of pictures, there would always be this one photo booth that was very popular with snaking queues, just for people to pay for a polaroid picture. I guess they want to commemorate their special time at the Christmas Wonderland especially with the couples in lurrveee. But from the pics below, there were many interesting sights to take couple pictures without paying. Then again, what would I know? haha..I was even there with my younger brother.

This would make an appearance at the Gardens during this festive period.

So inside the crystal tower was this maze of mirrors, not crazy mirrors though, where people would take videos and pictures of themselves facing the mirror. I tried to do an IG story on it and gawd I was such a noob. Even taking a selfie like the one above required several takes, for that one perfect shot, haha.

One of the angels on display made up of fairy lights.

How beautiful..but quite impossible to take a photo with the Christmas tree with people every now and then coming up to take pics. But not to worry, there were other smaller Christmas trees as well along the paths like this one below. Small and cute, like me. Hahaha! Tell me something funny.

So magical! Even from afar and the barricades.

That was us with the snow on our heads! We waited an hour just for this.

I hope you liked this post and make the time to come down for the last day tomorrow, 4pm to 11pm :))

You're Beautiful, No Matter What

Recently, I watched a video that struck me hard and I started crying and good thing I didn't ugly cry, but still, my make up was almost ruined haha. It was in the morning and just dolled myself up a little for work. I was working on my orders and watching you tube and then one video led to another. The original video was about entering 2019 with confidence. The other video, however, was about self love and looking at ourselves in the mirror and telling ourselves that we are beautiful. It is a social experiment on how much women actually love themselves by talking to the mirror, which by the way talked to them as well but someone was actually behind the voice, giving them prep talks.

It's sad how many women in general, whether young or mature, think so low about themselves and how life actually 'begins' when they look a certain way or lose some X amount of weight. The thing is, we don't have to wait for that moment before we can start loving ourselves and taking action to lead our lives towards the right direction or to chase our dreams. We can still change the world, irregardless of our physical appearance. We can care for others, make an impact in their lives and basically just enjoy our time here on each while we still can. To me, the last point is the most poignant as so much time is taken up just trying to figure our way around life and loathe ourselves because we don't like certain features of our physical appearance. 

I've mentioned many times how my low self esteem used to get me quite often but now, I just focus on doing what benefits me most such as eating healthily and exercising even if I don't get to achieve my dream body. And even if doing all this won't give me the killer looks or body, I am still ok, because I am taking proper care of myself. Even then, I think it's still normal for me to feel that sense of being 'unpretty' or 'unattractive' because not everyday we feel like we're a 100% confident of ourselves and that we can conquer the world. What matters is being able to flip that around and just lead our lives as normal as we can for as long as we are still able to.

However, what resonated with me in this video, on how words can actually hurt people, without them realising and that these words can stick to us and cut us deep like knives. As much as we don't wish for these words to affect, because they are after all, just words, they do. I mean we're still human beings with feelings. Obviously, those people who pass off these insensitive comments are just being rude and they don't actually care if they're going to hurt other people. We often put a brave front and then people think like oh, just because we don't look like we are affected by them, they can just say what they want to say without thinking.

The most dangerous thing is when we start to believe these words ourselves and that they are speaking the truth and no matter how we flip the situation, we just can't shake it off. That was when I felt for her when I watched the video. 

I hope this video and this blog post can create an awareness that we should start loving ourselves first irregardless of whether people are being such immatures trying to bring us down. Also, there's not even a need for these people when we are self sabotaging our own lives. At the end of the day, we are responsible in taking charge of our lives for ourselves and not for them.

Monday, December 17, 2018

Sentosa Island Lights 2018

Sentosa Island Lights is a series of installations by local artists in collaboration with a company here helmed by the former sticker lady who was commissioned by Sentosa to hold the exhibition. Even though she hated that nickname, and being in trouble with the law, years down the road, she got offers such as this that gave her the boost to show off her creativity, legally of course. It was quite near the Sentosa Beach station so it wasn't too far a walk. Though there wasn't a lot of the installations like the annual iLight Festival at Marina Bay, they are still interesting enough and instagram worthy too. 

Her story is an inspirational one for creative artists who often struggle to make it in Singapore as arts isn't quite widely acknowledged as other parts of the world. However, slowly, we are progressing and the moral and financial support given by the government and other agencies help these artists to make a name for themselves and still be able to survive in Singapore mostly from the commissions they make from big name collaborations.

Here are some of the pics taken on that day which we actually managed to still go even though we were pretty late actually. Good thing, we managed to travel back in time to Vivocity in time to catch the train back home.

Light to Night Festival 2019

This is a free festival by the National Gallery Singapore around the City Hall area which you should go. I went for both events which was...