Living Each Single Day

Hey, welcome to my little online space. I would say this is a blog of sorts, to help me sort out my thoughts. I also write about things going in my life with friends & family and being out and about in sunny Singapore. Life isn't easy, everyone knows that. While we are at it, don't forget to live life to the fullest :)

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Thursday, October 08, 2015

Bittersweet Ending to My Diploma Course

How could I miss this post?! I actually didn't write about how I got my results, now come to two weeks ago, and I'm so happy! I didn't get  any C again although I know that the important thing is to basically get the modular certificate, after going through project after project and test after project, often within a week or so of each other. In other words, we survived! Of course, there was also an exam that we had to take at the end of the course and to me and perhaps some other people too, it was the absolutely last chance to pull through, just like the final projects from other modules.

Some guy in my class was like saying why some people are so driven to get distinctions or do very well when the important thing is that we pass. But he would always be the most emotional one whenever we get back the results, verbalizing his happiness or his disappointment.  While at the end of the course we want to ultimately get it together and hold the diploma in our hand, the little achievements along the way are no mean feat as well. Juggling work, school and family (and business for some people, aka me..haha), is very challenging and to come out of it unscathed, it is also a personal achievement to us. 

This module was particularly challenging for me because I suck at projects and I barely passed for the tests. Suddenly I got swarmed by so many orders, I don't know where to begin, lol! But I am grateful for those opportunities and the upcoming ones as well that I got from Carousell and I am not going to give up this entrepreneurial spirit in me, just because I have to juggle with many things in life. It's just part of an on-going learning process, even as adults.

So it is going to be a bittersweet memory for me, as I am stepping into the last module. Seems like yesterday when my brother, then a newbie as well, accompanying me to the lecture room that has since then become the place where I absorb knowledge (or get mentally lost somewhere too, haha). But like life itself, expect some changes and we have to learn to adapt to it. Few months ago, my manager announced that she would be leaving the office for the headquarters. Now, the principal is also going to change to a new one. So the office will go through several changes as well. 

Perhaps, getting this diploma will open the door to more opportunities. I also look forward to doing my best for this last module and to know that one of the modules will be taught by my favourite  lecturer again, is like icing on the cake. He's such a funny, goofy and warm person and he draws from his experience as a part-time student himself. Yet, he's serious about us getting the most out of his class and he's not afraid to voice out his unhappiness if someone's being rude because to him, he will respect the person if the person respects him as well. It's just how it works. He just wants us to not waste the opportunity of coming to class tired especially after work and then treating it as though it's not of importance to us by being disrespectful when other people in the class are more keen to learn.

In other words, he's coolest lecturer of all! 

I know that this module will not be my final journey in developing my skills. I will continue to learn as learning is an on-going process and 5 years down the road, you will read about me pursuing a part-time course for a degree, if God willing :)

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Sunday, October 04, 2015

I Want to be Grateful But Sometimes, it's Hard

Nowadays I try to tell myself that I should be grateful for things like having some money before the next pay day instead of being completely broke, because believe me, I have been through days like those in the past, most recently towards end of last year. I also want to be grateful as well that even though I'm still struggling with weight issues, I don't want it to take precedent of my life like it's over if I don't get a certain weight. I want to be grateful that at least now, I have better choice of clothings compared to my younger days where getting a skirt means buying from Marks & Spencer or Robinsons which were then very expensive for someone who didn't earn that much. 

Now, I can wear skirts from H&M too and choose nice tops although until now, shopping for clothes is not my area of interest. I'd rather shop for pretty patterned papers so I can make pretty cards and sell them to make a bit of income, hehe.  But my mum seems to take over this shopping enthusiastically though :s

I still want to save more for rainy days without having to dip into them every now and then. I also want to reach my ideal weight. It's more and more seems very daunting and the haze thing isn't really helping because I can't walk and you know, eating lesser but with lesser exercise, doesn't come up to much. For the next two weeks, I am  planning on walking as I see the haze kinda clearing a bit and I also see people jogging as well. Also, school is starting soon and I am going to need the energy and not want to look as though I put on weight when I see my classmates.

I do am trying my best to accept my body as it is right now because it is not its fault for becoming in this state and I want to make even more effort for the last three months to lose some weight. I know it still won't be my ideal weight but at least there's progress. I also don't want to fret over it too much as there are more pressing issues than just worrying about that extra flab on my tummy. Health is of course important and as long as I am following a healthy lifestyle, and putting in extra effort, I am positive that the weight will just drop off before I know it.

But until now, I want to continue to be more confident and more accepting of my body and do what is right for it and not abuse it any longer. The progress may be slow but we'll get there. Love yourself first because you are worth it. I am grateful that I can fit in clothes better than previously and slowly, but surely, that annoying tummy flab will be gone. If it doesn't completely go away, life goes on. I also want to be grateful that I am continuously making as much effort as I can, stashing money away so that I don't come to a point I'm only left with $30 to $50 and face sleepless nights thinking how am I going to feed the family the next day. 

Yes, as mentioned, I have gone through dark days for being obese and completely broke. I am keeping my promise intact that I will continue to do what it takes to stay healthy (like drinking green tea for a less bloated tummy, eurgh..) and cutting down on buying things unnecessarily when I could use whatever I have first. I do feel a tinge of jealousy when some people get more orders than me until they have to stop orders while I'm like self promoting almost daily. But, I still get orders, though not as much as them, and for this, I am grateful. 

There are many motivational speakers or even inspiring people that have gone through tough times and grateful that they are still here, being given the chance to live again, even though they have lost up to three limbs. They have gone on living life to the fullest. While initially they were in shock and disbelief but over time, they have accepted the situation because to them, this is not the final deal. Life still offers them many opportunities that even able-bodied people struggle to do or refuse to do. 

We have our struggles and I know other people too, have their struggles. It's not up to us to judge them thinking oh, they could have done this or done that. But really, we're not in their shoes so we don't know how it's like and our situation can be so different from them. Instead, we should focus on being more kind and compassionate instead of always thinking about how we can never be as slim or pretty like other girls or as rich as some other people who can go on holidays on a whim.

Be grateful and aim to always do our best in whatever we're doing and to make each day better than the  previous :) It's hard but we can do it.

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Monday, September 28, 2015

The Shock, The Horror...

Yes, shock shock horror horror (thumbs up if you could get the song reference)..I, as usually, would wanna see that big guy in the gym that Sunday afternoon but planning on laying low, in case I appeared as Little Miss Stalker or aunty-like gym goer.  I walked past the weights area, took a glance and I couldn't see him and what I saw was like this guy in red singlet with two rather big tattoos on his biceps doing the deadlifting (is that what you call it, I dunno..something like that) who stood out with his tatts.

So, okay..maybe he's not around. No biggie (like real) and I went to check my hair and appearance in the gym toilet before making my way back out. Took a sip of water from the water cooler and then started to make my way to the elliptical trainer and OH MY FREAKING GOSH.....

That guy...with the red sleeveless singlet...and the two tatts....belongs to HIM!! My gym crush!!

How can I not spot him. He was looking my direction, I guess he wass thinking eh, the aunty is here, lololol...

But yah, reality check, he has tatts now :( and why I didn't think that his tatts were there all along were because I've not seen them before and believe me, I've seen those biceps worked multiple times, heh.

He had always been wearing mostly white tight fitting shirt, coz he's pretty big so pretty much all his shirts would be like that, but I would have noticed them even when covered up when he flexes them or through the sheerness of his shirt.

Then I started debating in my mind. Should I continue with my crush on him on the pretext of having him as my imaginary boyfriend, based on those tatts I've seen, or am I just being paranoid and being judgmental against people with tatts. My own good friend has a small tatt on her hip and she's still the same ol' nicest person I know.

Plus, it's not as if I am going out with him or something and have no intention either. So I thought heck, those tatts seem like a dealbreaker and possibly a sign that I should quit crushing on him.

But I dunno. Trust me, I do want to not be so engrossed with this guy anymore because he seems to be more and more vain to me. The new tatts on his biceps, that looked like tribal designs, kinda cemented that fact, like he's super proud of them.

Still, I'm like still concentrating on my own workout because that is the main reason why I'm here for and looking at the rest of the girls, obviously younger and prettier than me, all dressed up in sports gear and in full concentration, I wanna be like them too. Not being overly consumed about that guy. That change of thought jolted me as I re-focused although months of crushing on him, I can't just forget about it in a snap.

I still kinda briefly take stolen glances to see his whereabouts but lesser. Once, I was at the abs machine and as I was using it, suddenly he came and stood infront of me as he had this circuit thing going on where he would use the abs machine, lift dumbbells and proceed to the weights machine before going back to this abs machine.

Why do I know all this, lol.

At first, he was checking his phone as he stood waiting (I didn't really look at him but I'm kinda of an expert at looking but not's a girl thing) then he was looking at me to see if I'm done. I would have done more but yah, it's kinda scary being waited like that, lol..and I stood up, wiped the seat like I always do if got people about to use coz I don't want them to sit on my butt sweat.

So what's my conclusion of this tatts commotion? I dunno...maybe my admiration is less although it will be quite fun to have a friend like him coz it's like so! As if with or without tatts, it would make a difference coz I doubt he will ever talk to me, just like everyone else in the gym. The girls have taught me one thing but even before that I have concluded WHY I'm in the gym in the first place, when I could have spent my time doing my favourite activity, napping, that I'm here to stay healthy and possibly lose some weight, and not prowl over some guys at the gym.

Although the motivation to go has died a bit though, lol.

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Saturday, September 26, 2015

Race to Weekend cum Birthday Celebration with F1 2015

My last birthday celebration on Friday was so unique because for the first time, I got to go to the F1 Grand Prix or the Night Race 2015. 


We would have gone earlier but it's always the case of not having enough moolah even though come to think of it, for the price we paid for the cheapest ticket, it would have been worth it. But with my brother's persuasion, since he would be paying for his own since he's earning his own moolah now from his part-time job, there was no way he could give up this chance. And so I did and it was such a thrilling experience :)

It wasn't the actual match but rather, the practice run and yet, we enjoyed every single moment of it. Of course it was later quite tiring because we were often walking around in the enclosed areas and even though we didn't catch many acts in between as we got hungry and went out..hehe, the best part was catching Pharrell Willliams live. Yes, THE Pharrell and he was so energetic on the stage and so kind to let lucky audience members join the stage with the young men, young ladies and even children. 

So how was the race? Gosh, they were so fast! Catching them on pictures were a challenge. Hence, why you would only see blurry pictures or the tail of the car way way way up the track. I was always wondering how the heck they maneuver the tight spaces after speeding and then breaking in time to negotiate the turns. Hence why there were experts, lol. Oh, if you didn't know, someone ventured out into the tracks where the cars were zooming and it took the racer, who eventually won the race, to spot the intruder. I saw many marshalls and security people and yet, one guy managed to stroll in.

Go figure.

So yah, next year they would be tightening the security by having more marshalls and higher gates.

Oh yes, about the race, I was so excited about the cars zooming past us that initially I went 'wah! wah! wah!' up to a point, my brother was asking me if I was going to say that for every car that raced past.


We ended the night watching Pharrell Williams performed for an hour and a half as mentioned earlier, he was really good. We watched from quite far behind because many people were already crowded infront so we mostly watched from the giant screens. I could see him on the stage but yah, he was still too far. 

Going back, we had to brave the crowd expectedly, and I would have been lost as to where to turn and where to get our transport back home if not my brother. Trust me, I'm clueless when it comes to directions, lol! It was really hard to see because of the crowd that were going out at the same time. They actually opened up the race tracks to allow the crowds to go through and since it was the tracks, you know what would happen in the next instant. Many many selfies! Not just us, but other people as well. 

But patience was a virtue throughout our F1 walkabout going from one place to another via the MRT underpass and they actually stopped the escalators and hence there were a lot of stair climbing, which was also why we looked so tired in the picture. I believed I would have burnt my McDonald's dinner by then, haha.

Oh, SMRT and SBS Transit were kind enough to extend the timings so we managed to get a train back home which wasn't crowded at all because most people took from the City Hall MRT station. We would have hopped on that train as well but we were nearer to Clark Quay MRT station, thankfully. Of course we still had to walk some 10 to 15 minutes back home but the night was cool and we were still excited about our night :)

Enjoy the pictures below!

Our pass and lanyard is inside! Our ticket to the F1 walkabout

One of the entrances to the walkabout

A race was taking place, but not the actual race cars

This was the best picture, trust me! lol..

Someone so happy he finally went to the F1 walkabout :)

Taking a break in the Esplanade. Thank God for aircon.

Our F1 journey ends here, sweaty face and all :)


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Tuesday, September 22, 2015

My Money Rant

I had a craving for Sogurt brand yoghurt for some time already even though I had the rival brand Llao Llao pretty recently too, bought by my brother. I admit that the yoghurt is rather pricey, especially when they go by weight and as controlled as I was in squeezing out the yoghurt, as it was DIY, and then putting in controlled amounts of toppings, it still come out to be pretty expensive. I don't know how those other people, who defo put in more yoghurt and toppings can eat in peace while in my heart, I'm like gosh, how did it come out to that price?

However, if you ask me, it was er...worth it for what I got? But I wouldn't have it like a weekly treat but a monthly treat. It would have been a killer in my wallet if I have it too often.

You know just now in my wallet, I had $70 and then now I'm left with $12. The lunch and the yoghurt that I had just now, easily cost me $10.00 and that's for my own only. After that, groceries..okay, this one can't escape and I also bought a magazine for $3.50 because it was their 21st birthday and they had plenty of giveaways for this issue. Just so you know, I seldom buy magazines nowadays even though my favourite magazine was only $3.50 compared to the other names. It's also my mum's birthday so I can't come home empty handed so what I got was some food which came up to $23.00. Since it didn't come with a drink, and she wanted to drink something ice-y, I got for her a bubble tea that cost $3.00.

Probably you're thinking, why am I telling you all this. Except for the fact that it was my mum's birthday and also I had this craving for frozen yoghurt, I wouldn't spend this much in a day. Close maybe, but not the point I'm left with money that is probably going to be used to top up my ez link card for travel.

A frugal family would probably just cook a simple birthday meal and buy a small yoghurt tub from the supermarket. But it's my mum's birthday and I can't tell her to cook the meal. And I didn't have the yoghurt for some time already so it's justified. Even though admittedly I was pretty bummed at how much I had left, it left me thinking how other families cope when things are so expensive. And how some other families can afford to eat out quite often and buy groceries that cross that $50 mark even. But I can't judge. For all I know, that amount of $100 over they spent on groceries, would have been for their monthly or weekly expenditures depending on how big their family is. And the families I see in the restaurant eating, it could just be a monthly family bonding thing for them too to celebrate an occasion or just because they had received their salary and what better than to treat the family after a month of hard work.

So we can't judge. But I still think that it's also important to spend within our means and to not spend it for now only because we still need money in the future. I often hear people saying that well, I spent most of my salary already this week. So I'm not going to spend for the whole of two weeks. Erm, hate to break this to you but you still need moolah to survive that next two weeks. Otherwise you will just be living in misery for not being able to get even the most basic necessities. 

I've had my financial struggles, most recently last quarter of 2014 and the feeling was like, eurgh. My online business was pretty slow and every day I was begging and begging to God to give me sales so that I could tide over financially for the week. The salary I received, after giving my mum cash and then paying the bills, could not sustain for long given how things can be quite expensive here. 

In the end, I received some advanced cash but not for me, it was payment for something at work and I secretly used the money. I did  pay back when I received my bonus in December and although it was still quite a significant amount to return, if it wasn't for that cash advance, I would struggle BIG time. I do hope I don't have to do that again this year so I've been pretty good in controlling my expenditures, although yes it still suck when I have days like how I described above, where I'm left with this much only after having a certain amount in my wallet.

Again, I want to say that money isn't everything. Sure, it is important but I don't want to like be so obsessed with it that, true story, I would keep on calculating how much I have left and how much I will have, sometimes throughout the bus or train journey. As long as the money is sufficient, good enough but again I won't be complacent and will work hard to promote my online shop to rake in some sales.

This year, I actually jumped onto another free platform and while the sales are quite sporadic, I receive queries and eventually orders. So I don't have to solely rely on facebook anymore. I have yet to get to the stage like some people who would write on instagram on how they feel bad about rejecting orders because they have not much time because most of these people, do it on a part-time basis like me, while juggling a full time job. My thought was, wow...lucky you. Their social media presence made such impact. I only ever had to close my shop once due to overwhelming orders last July but that was just a one-time thing. But that was also because that month was intensive as I had several school projects going on too.

Meanwhile on the other side of the world, families struggle to make ends meet especially when they live in war torn countries and they have very little money for daily necessities and their own and children's medical expenses. Due to lack of food and proper hygiene, they often get sick especially the children and they don't have enough to buy medicine at the pharmacy, because they need the money to buy food supplies like rice. If they get to buy these necessities, it's sad to see how little they can buy which they have to ration carefully so that they have food to eat for the week.

Other children crave for electronic goods and most time, their parents would buy for them with no qualms as long as they pass their exams. For these children, the situation can become so bad that they are the ones going out to work because their parents don't earn enough to support the family.

I'm not saying all this for you to go all zen and cut down mercilessly on all things possible. What I'm saying is to spare a thought for your future and other people who barely have food to eat and clean water supplies. Don't go on a spending rampage whenever you have money and be completely broke the next moment. You can buy the latest make up collection from Urban Decay or the latest gadget but make sure  you still have enough money for food, and if you have a family, to put food on the table and also to save for future because don't think that well, you can just cut down by spending lesser or none at all. ANYTHING can happen and you still need money to survive.

Okay enough rant about money here. Every individual is different and had different needs. But everyone needs to learn to make more informed choices instead of just blindly following the trends and then hurt their own pockets later on. Let's be wiser and spare a thought.

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