Monday, August 12, 2019

Long Weekend, A Little Rambling & My Lack of Gratitude

The day I discover IG filters

It's almost mid week to August..argh. I am in the midst of a long weekend, which sadly will come to end by tonight. Just did some cleaning up of my room like throwing many things away because someone is going to come and fix the fibre box or something. So I need to get rid of a lot of junks. 

At the same time, I am also catching up on orders. As I am typing this, I was rather cheesed off with one of the buyers but I also try not to lose it and act calmly because I don't think it will solve the matter. Speaking of which, there is no resolve in it as I don't want to trouble myself with posting the item as the person herself is not making any effort to pick up the item even though it has been days including the long weekend. There is always some darn excuse and because of that, I don't want to go to the post office, even though I could, just to make up for her tardiness.

But as I always tell myself, life's like that, and there is someone else who will appreciate the efforts and make the time to meet and collect the item. I am not so hard up with cash that I die die must give the item to them and take the cash. It's just beyond me how they can keep asking and then when it's ready for collection, oh okay, I take my time. Honestly, it's a little unfair to me because I have others whom I need to finish earlier but coz of the pressure, I had to finish these people's ones earlier and then end up they either delay the collection or worse, not collect at all.

Simply not cool.

Anyway, enough of ranting. I actually want to talk about how I am lacking in gratitude nowadays which may or may not contribute to such sad situations as per above. This small humble online business of mine allows me to earn some pocket money each week, and I notice that for every amount I collect, I say thanks to them but not thanking the person who makes it happen aka God. My only concern was what do I do with this money I receive. Do I deposit it and accumulate the amount or spend it on the fam? 

I am also simply rushing through things and one time, almost had an anxiety attack because I had to complete 3 boxes by that morning. See that's the thing. I try to plan and then people respond late and I already said I can do it by a certain date. But this would add on to the confirmed orders from people who responded earlier. 

When I rush things, I tend to do it with a lack of passion. I don't enjoy the process because every second passing by was causing me anxiety as I might not be able to complete in time as I had to also prepare myself to go to work. 

So I decided to slow down and take in orders within my capacity. If I can't do it within the time frame they give, I tell them. Of course there will be those who will beg, and I know this is possibly coz my items are more affordably priced, but I have to be fair to those who had ordered earlier. 

Here's the thing too. Because of the overwhelming requests, I forgot to say gratitude again for the orders that will allow me to earn some cash. I would be like..oh more query come in, how am I going to cope. But thankfully, here is most likely the only area I need to work on my gratitude.

For others, I am grateful that I am still able to enjoy my life doing some other things that I enjoy such as being able to groove to Zumba and getting better at it. If not, I just try to wing it especially with the new song routines, lol. Nobody really notices coz we are all struggling. Also, same as Strong by Zumba, which I never thought I could actually last coz every workout session is very intense. I will be enjoying a quick one minute break and then go into the same jumping and lunging routine again for the next quadrant, lol. 

I say my gratitude that no matter how tiring each session was, my body was able to take on the stress as it is fit enough to do those moves. It didn't matter that I may be bigger in built than the rest, or weigh more, point is..I still can do it.

Work wise, I am in good company where I have someone to rant about and have lunch which I am grateful about so I don't feel so lonely. I also have a good understanding lead manager, unlike my previous one, where no matter how much people praise her, there are times where I feel she exercised her control too much on her people. Look, I don't have to work for her and yet I am still doing her quarterly report coz she feels her people are too 'busy'. But I still feel grateful that my brain allows me to use the excel formulas so that I can finish the reports faster and get it over and done with. No matter how many times she asked me to re-do coz of her impatience with the student health unit who keeps sending amended copies as she kept chasing them.

Everyone has their own versions and different things they are grateful. Sometimes, it is out of experience such as the hardship they went through previously which makes them grateful for the kind of life they have right now. I once watched a video of a single mum of two who used to struggle with her debts but one day, after sitting down watching other you tubers takling their own debts, it inspired her to take action and make things right to regain back her sanity and for the sake of her children. So while she managed to clear her debt, she makes it a priority to lead a simple but grateful life as she didn't want to go back that life again and to save up for a better future. 

We only have one life and we are the driver behind the steering wheel so it is up to us, and having faith in God that things will get better when it's not being that good. At the same time, being grateful for the things and people that we have but often forget about as we are too caught up with life's problems and people's expectations of us. 

Let us be more positive in life and strive to be a better person each day :)

Tuesday, July 30, 2019

In Competition with Ourselves

Gosh I am such a sloth this month but there are times I hustle hard and stay committed. But it's hard. Can I just roll up into a ball like a cat and do nothing and self clean? lol..

What you see above is my journal which I have been faithfully writing so that I can recall the things that I have done and should have done. Overall, it's a process to clear my head and to write down some opinionated pieces based on what I see or read. I have always been writing but it's quite sporadic and this time, decided to dedicate time to journal.

However, things can't change and our lives can't improve if we don't do something about it. Someone I know of, has big dreams, most a little far fetched, but failed to even want to take the small steps right now to improve the current situations. Because in the mind, it keeps thinking, oh I am better than this..but for how long, are you going to be stuck in this stagnant state and rely on people's sympathy.

We are sucked into the world of social media, how people present themselves online, and then we will #goals but we don't know the actual grinding, which is not shown mostly. At times, they do show a sneak peak like this is the number of emails and WhatsApp chat I have to go through or this is the amount of paperwork.

One time, there was this young entrepreneur who just rented a new studio, her third one, and she held promotional classes. She was so busy that she could hardly take a breather in between, like having a proper lunch. She ate out of the tuna can and also ran out of quick meals to eat from 7 eleven. I know how it is like, when you have to grind, and then everything else matters less, including food like a proper meal.

Back to me being a sloth, haha. July whizzed past and can you believe, for the whole of last week, I didn't even bother with night time skincare routine. It is already very very simplified unlike other people's 10 to 12 steps beauty regime. Still, I feel lazy, haha.

But how can I take things for granted. Do I have to wait for a break out or some nasty pimple to come out to learn my lesson. And then at one point, I didn't go to the work gym for about a month. Instead, I spent most of my lunch time listening to my colleague complaining about life in general when I should be working out at least half an hour on the cross trainer. So last week, I decided to put a stop to it. I already told my colleague, but yah..she still tried to carry on the convo..but I guess I was like, I really have to go. It's just like Sunday gym routine where I feel that I am forced to go because my mum would prepare the workout clothes without fail so if I don't go, the guilt is there, haha.

So I am going to treat this skincare routine as a 'have to do' thing as well. I started the routine again. Like me with Spanish. I have been faithfully learning Spanish on the go but it has been awhile since I watched the YouTube videos, relying on short cuts to learn while commuting to and fro from work. But at least I still learn new word and phrases though not enough still, if I want to reach fluency levels.

I am also a little more determined to save aggressively after watching a youtube video a few days ago and how she hustled her way to get out of her current financial situation and being a single mum of two. She watched a video and felt so inspired that she put into practice the things she learnt online so that she can be debt free as well. At the same time, she also wants to save for the future and she does all this with so much determination that she feels liberated when she made the last payment and more secure because compared to her last bank balance which she screenshot a few years ago, she is much better now. But it doesn't mean she has slacked. She still works hard though not as aggressive as before because she has lesser things to be worried financially. So now she works on saving more.

Let us all strive to be a better person than we were yesterday. Instead of whining all the time, and comparing ourselves to others and be all sad about it, we should be in competition with ourselves. We only stand to benefit from it though in the process, let's not forget to take care of our health. For myself, stop being a sloth! haha..

Sunday, July 14, 2019

Happy July! Mid Year Check-in With Goals

Time flies past so quickly and now we have reached the 2nd week of July. I think it is time for me to reanalyse my goals or to create new ones. Life is about living, being inspired but at times, we also give in too much to laziness as an excuse to being tired. We still have to get up and do it, make the day worthwhile and also be grateful for what we have. Because often, we focus on things we wish we have that it kinds of make us feel rather miserable because we felt that we are just cruising through life aimlessly.

There were a few things going on last week already and it was only the start of July. My mum had a health scare after a meal of lontong and cold drinks. Lontong is a coconut milk thickened spicy soup with rice cakes and veggies. It is a popuar dish but for me, I avoid food that contains coconut milk. Over the years, you just learn to live without food that is not good for you in the long term.

Anyway about my mum, she suddenly complained about breathlessness and started panicking though she could still breathe, just was having chest pains. It was pretty dramatic because she kept saying she was going to die repeatedly but on the other hand, I was trying to be calm, let her drink water and then sleep more comfortably in the sofa bed with both fans facing her to cool her down. My aunt, however, called at the wrong time and started to also panic and thinking that I was taking this lightly. Of course I do not but she can say whatever she wanted though.

She turned up at night because she was very worried and my mum was actually getting better but she kept talking and talking after persuading my mum to go to hospital, but it didn’t happen. She started to comment few times about the state of our house because it was not exactly clean though she mentioned a few times she didn’t care. But apparently she ‘cared’ a lot.

Then funny enough, the following day she messaged me saying she fell ill with diarrhoea and then the day after, high fever. My mum got better but still not in good physical state which was normal for someone who just started to recover. My aunt is a typical attention seeker and when she seeked treatment in A&E (Because must show example to my mum, she sick she go hospital), and while pending admission into normal ward, gave her bed number in the emergency ward. Obviously this meant she wanted my mum to show up for moral support or whatever. 

She didn’t say she wanted her to go but later that afternoon when I accompanied my mum, she said again and I was like *rolls eyes* she was on the way already.

Apparently other people I know had their family members who fell ill as well but in other forms of illnesses. My colleague’s husband fell ill twice within days because his kidney stones were acting up. Last I heard, the doctor only recommended meds to flush out the stones as they were tiny. Tiny but mighty coz I heard too they could cause extreme discomfort.

All these health scares made me realise how important health is. I honestly am not the best when it comes to my own  health needs but I do what I can to keep healthy. None of those fad diets though I know some really work. I want to do this for a long time, not just to get the results I want. It takes commitment, hunger moments like when I don’t eat between 8 to 12pm and then 2 to 6.30pm on weekdays..wah so challenging, hehe. Our body constantly crave for food and when we feel full at one point, two hours later hunger strikes again. One tip is to just trick my brain into thinking that it is full by drinking more fluid instead of snacks.

So if you want to refresh your goals like mine, let’s make our health as one of them. For example, if you have not been exercising, joining a fitness class can be fun and in Singapore there are many free fitness classes that you can join after work or on weekends. For that one hour, you get to move your body and improve the blood circulation which then  leads to a healthier heart and other vital organs. Don’t just think about exercising to want to look physically good only. It goes beyond that.

And learn new skills too even if it is just for fun, to occupy time or even make money in future with the newfound skills. I am learning Spanish and at first it was daunting (still is, who am I kidding, lol..) but it is a great moral booster and makes life more inspiring and meaningful. I hope to reach fluency by end of the year so I will no longer be bilingual, haha.

Happy JULY!!!

Sunday, June 30, 2019

The Taiwanese Drama I was Hooked On: HIStory 3 Trapped

Meng Shao Fei

Tang Yi


Zhao Zhi

Trapped poster

The last scene where both couples were shown together

The End

First of all, my apologies that this is going to be a long ass post. For the last couple of months, I have been watching this Taiwan drama faithfully and I look forward to Tuesdays and Wednesdays like why can't the time can't go any faster, lol. I have anticipated this drama since December and it may not be everyone's cup of tea but it was widely popular including going international. Even though it had been publicised as a BL (Boy's Love) explanation needed for that, but it still had a serious central theme and it was unlike other dramas I had watched that relied on fan service. Meaning, mostly doing actions or saying things, often cringeworthy but for the sake of viewership to lure us innocent but hungry fans in, haha. Also, sometimes while these dramas can be very sweet, funny and touching at the same time such as my favourite Crossing the Line and Addicted, I have not come across such drama like this with such intense acting and plots that were very interesting as well. So in all, every character in that drama was given a significant role to play, and none disappointed. All of them played their role to the core. Also, the drama threw a lot of curveballs and unanticipated things that threw us off tangent, no matter how we tried to guess who did it.

You will get to empathise with them why they had done what they did, even though it was morally wrong, and that the main character's driven need to revenge his adopted father, became his downfall and barely saved by the other main character who had been chasing him for the last couple of years for the answer. 

Basically, it was a BL love story between the gang leader and the police who wanted to find out who had killed his senior. The gang leader's name was Tang Yi and the police was Meng Shao Fei. 

There was another couple called Jack, the loyal sidekick to Tang Yi and Zhao Zhi, the police partner to Shao Fei who initially predicted that he would fall for Tang Yi eventually. They had their plot line too but it mainly revolved around food coz Zhao Zhi was a foodie. Jack himself was an interesting character. He had this killer smile even when he was being a badass as Tang Yi's loyal sidekick or when he was playing with his foldable knife and also when he was enamoured by Zhao Zhi's antics. 

He was initially captured by Jack because he wanted to know where Shao Fei had gone missing with his boss, Tang Yi, but then he became captured or attracted instead by Zhao Zhi's innocent and naive character. So he devised a plan to meet Zhao Zhi often after releasing him on a good note the next day, lol. Coz Zhao Zhi was that naive like he practically made friends with a dangerous guy just because he had cooked for him in exchange for Shao Fei's phone number. The same guy who had kidnapped him. But Jack started to care more for him by cooking for him and bringing him food to his workplace and the hospital where Shao Fei was hospitalised after being shot. He had stayed overnight to look after him but well, let's just say, he didn't do a good job, haha.

For Tang Yi and Shao Fei, Tang Yi was the only witness and had survived the shootout so he wanted to find the answers for him. But he had kept mum all the while because he wanted to avenge himself. When the suspected killer had made his way back home to Taiwan from overseas, he played along with his game until he was being played himself when the suspect threatened to kill his adopted sister and him as well. He had his own motive of killing because he had gone to jail for 24 years for his good friend, whom he thought was his loyal gang brother but had betrayed his loyalty. So by killing Tang Yi, whom he thought was senior Tang's son, he had exacted his revenge. He wasn't being disloyal but was pretty mum about some secrets.

However, the twist was that Shao Fei had discovered Tang Yi was actually HIS son, the murder suspect and rival gang leader, and his senior's son as well, after discovering that the music box had hidden Tang Yi's birth certificate and ultimately finding out who his birth parents were.

Tang Yi himself was a very deep character. He had grown up without his parents' love and his adopted mother had died shortly after his adoption. His adopted father loathed him because he had blamed him for causing his wife's death. So the poor boy had ran away from him and that was where he had met up with the senior Tang when he tried to save a girl from a couple of guys chasing her for stealing a bike. 

So he grew up in senior Tang's house and took over his role as the gang leader when he died. As senior Tang had helped him a lot by providing him with love and a house to live in, he had looked up to Senior Tan as his own father so his death hit him hard. He hardly showed emotions except when when Shao Fei was shot by a hired gunman and that guy was brutally beaten up by him later on because at that time, he was slowly starting to have feelings for Shao Fei already.

However, Shao Fei's injury became the catalyst to him to slowly breaking his hard exterior because after Senior Tang, he had not cared for anyone as much as him yet.

For Shao Fei, though he was serious in finding out the answers to his senior's death when everyone else had given up the case, in his bid of chasing Tang Yi, he started to slowly fall for him. Well, Tang Yi, despite his hard exterior, was a very good looking and charismatic guy. His junior was saying that he was extremely popular, and had shown his affections for both guys and girls. So he was bi as well, haha. Perfect. So during a dance segment when Shao Fei was at a stakeout in a club, and Tang Yi was there as well, to get more info from the club owner, they made eye contact and Tang Yi had purposely kissed the club owner to trigger Shao Fei to see if he had any reactions.

Of course Shao Fei did and over time, started to question himself if he was falling for him, and through other encounters later, had made his jealousy known to Tang Yi. Meanwhile Tang Yi was slowly opening up to Shao Fei, though still in serious mode, with Shao Fei's endearing character. 

While the trailers showed that Tang Yi was the one who fell for him, but it turned out to be Shao Fei who first declared his attraction to Tang Yi which shocked the latter though he himself felt that he had changed because of Shao Fei. The cutest thing was that when they became a couple, in one episode, he was so agitated when he could not contact Shao Fei and  left 50 over voice calls and messages as his phone batt was dead so he couldn't respond back and he didn't notice it too as he was busy investigating. 

I liked the other couple too though the development was pretty slow but I get it because they were not the main couple. Jack was the one who confessed at first, no surprise, and thought that since Zhao Zhi was open minded about Shao Fei and Tang Yi, he wouldn't have a problem with him. However, Zhao Zhi could not accept his love at first as he was new to all this and he had never loved anyone before. But he continued to be friends with him and er, took his food pack willingly when Jack prepared for him with love according to him and brought it to his workplace.

It was only in the second last episode when Zhao Zhi finally accepted him when Jack had to leave overseas for a mission when it was revealed that he was working as a mercenary, meaning, working undercover to get insider info. He could not let him go just as others had left him as well, and Jack felt that he had to stay....if Zhao Zhi wanted him to. When he said 'don't go' and Jack was so touched he kissed him, they became official. Jack was there for him when Zhao Zhi was at his lowest point after knowing about what his boss and senior did. 

Oh yes, what did the boss and senior colleague do. Apparently, when Shao Fei was busy chasing after Tang Yi, and got into trouble a few times, with his boss and by ending up in hospital 3 times, it turned out that his own boss knew all along who had killed his senior and the Tang Yi's adopted father as well. They knew each other through personal encounters (read the paragraphs above, haha) and had enlisted her help to find out who had stolen his drugs among the police.

That police was actually the boss and the senior colleague. Shao Fei's boss had stolen to pay for his daughter's wedding and it was only that one time when he got the money from another gang after selling the drugs to him. He had tried to stop Shao Fei but never really did because he wanted him to find out the truth himself because he felt that he had failed as a police officer. Eventually he turned himself in shocking others at his dirty deed and Shao Fei showed the pics and video of his daughter getting married which made him super emotional. 

But the senior one, he kept at it because it paid more than his lowly income as a police officer. The boss tried to stop him but failed. So when he felt threatened by Shao Fei's senior and Tang Yi's senior, he shot them so that his secret was safe. When Tang Yi's real dad, aka the suspected killer (I forget his name) who was at the crime scene but could not see the killer except for his hooded jacket covering his head, saw someone at the club who dressed up like him, and immediately knew that he was the one. So in actual fact, he didn't kill though he had the intention and sent the real killer to Tang Yi who get real mad at him and started to bash him up but stopped short at shooting him when Shao Fei went into the line of fire to prevent Tang Yi from being a killer.

Shao Fei survived, yet again..but made Tang Yi had a change of heart by handing over the real killer and the instigator over to the police as Shao Fei convinced him that revenge was not the answer as his future would be ruined which Senior Tang would not agree to and his loved ones would suffer. He didn't want to hurt Shao Fei anymore and decided to do the necessary. 

It was a bittersweet ending because Tang Yi still went to jail for attempted murder but after embracing and kissing Shao Fei whom he thanked for loving him and who would wait for him to come out of the jail. That moment was also the final realisation for me that this show had officially ended with 'The End' and had captured me in every week. And also anticipation of each episode being uploaded subbed in English by this guy on Facebook who went through difficulties himself from the jealousy of others just so that the international fans could enjoy the show as well. My life revolved around them for two days each week. Like I want to hurry up with work and other activities so that I can go home and keep refreshing the page for some cuts of the episodes before the final uploading.

Each season has two shows and the next one, doesn't look as interesting as this one..haha..but the again, I doubt something else would even top it coz it was that good. I wouldn't say it was perfect but overall, it was still very good. The best of its kind, I would say. I miss all the characters :( I will surely re-watch all the 20 episodes in future again.

Saturday, June 01, 2019

Happy 1st June & Walking in Geylang Bazaar

First of all, we have officially entered a new month which is June. Almost half way people! Gosh, does time really fly that fast? What have we achieved so far? If we are barely scratching the surface with our goal motivations, let us move forward and fight on to make things better for ourselves.

Anyway, we are also coming to the end of the fasting month. All fellow Muslims, if they are in good health, are to fast for one whole month because it is said that with fasting, we learn patience and also learn about the difficulties the poor experience when they lack of food and drink. So in return, we become more generous and giving when knowing about their plight. In short, this is a good month to restart and become better Muslims and hopefully, our good deeds will go beyond the holy month. 

As part of the fasting month, there are many bazaars that were being held that sell things in preparation for the Hari Raya and also for the break fast. Temptations of food were aplenty and when you go without food and drinks since the break of dawn, everything looks tempting. However, with so much variety of food, both traditional and fancy, it is easy to want to buy all, lol. But of course, we can't be so tempted by such good food every day because it is not healthy for our pockets. We also need to keep money for the upcoming Raya preparations. 

We went to the iconic Geylang Bazaar to try out the different foods, with money ready of course. But we were also strategic like we knew what we wanted to buy. It was a matter of finding them and queueing up, of course. I must say that this time round, it was a little more spacious with some seating areas as well where people can sit down to relax awhile and enjoy their food. Because dang, it can get so hot. Just see how we sweat in the picture below, lol.

This year, we didn't go all out exploring different bazaars but just this one. I think it is good enough. I went twice while my brother went four times, to try out the same types of food again, haha. He went with me the first time last Sunday and then with different groups of friends the next few days within the same week. I guess being in the much younger age group, they liked to explore around while older people like him prefer to chill at home, than being in the humid atmosphere and without all the jostling. I went the second time because I wanted to eat the Takoyaki. I didn't eat much that day because I was so freaking full. It was nice but of course, the Yummy Takoyaki was nicer but they were not selling at the bazaar. I think even if they were, I'd rather not buy because they are known to have long queues and queueing in a non aircon space is a no no for me.

Enjoy the pics below!

Tuesday, May 28, 2019

Beauty is Subjective

Photo by Lisa Fotios from Pexels

I recently watched a youtube video by a local content creator and she was sharing how she normally spends her days, now that she is back in Singapore to visit her family. While each day is unique, she typically divides her time between spirituality, work, healthy and family and friends. Each one is pivotal in the running of her life and being productive. I think that is a great way in how you spend time and make the best use of it, rather than just wasting time on social media which uh..most of us are guilty of. Me especially, lol.

Anyway, what caught my interest to write this blog post was a shopping trip she had with her sisters. One of her younger sisters liked this blouse with banana prints on it, which in her opinion, was pretty questionable, prompting her to ask if she thought that looked nice. Her sister confidently said 'Beauty is subjective'. 

Well, she is right. I honestly never thought of phrasing it that way though I try my best not to compare myself to others. It's hard but I have come to accept that well, I will never be of averaged size. But my world doesn't stop revolving, right? Life still goes on.

Anyway, everyone views beauty differently. It can be physical looks, size, appearance and fashion taste. What's questionable fashion to you, may be a total cool piece of fashion to them. It's very subjective. Some guys like having muscular arms, like really muscular looking, some like having subtle defined arms or just regular looking arms, haha. Some girls like long hair while some girls love their pixie hairstyle. Then there are girls who go all out doiling themselves in make up because more is more and those who prefer the less is more look.

Personally, I like make up though I don't really like to spend too much on it because they're ridiculously priced nowadays. But most people I know, whether at work, or my own friends, they're not really make up people so it's hard to relate or share my interests. But I like it because it gives me some confidence boost. I am no pro of course yet I still like having a bit of blusher or mascara. It's not about getting approval from others because that can be unhealthy but you look good for yourself, you know. 

Then there are those who went for plastic surgery to change some parts of their looks and if they are influencers or celebrities, often they get nasty remarks on how they are being bad role models towards their younger audience. First of all, they can do what they want and they don't owe you a living. They want to look their best and if they think changing their looks can help, it's up to their discretion. At the end of the day, it's for their own happiness. Of course when it became like an addiction then probably they need help because the issue has become much deeper than just wanting to look good until their health is affected.

So back to the sisters's story. So the older sister chanced upon a blouse with animal motives which she liked and immediately got countered attacked by the younger one, like who had questionable taste now. In the end she said, eh then you can become the zoo and I will be the one with the bananas. So we're all happy with our choices.

Even when I watched these Korean Idols how handsome or fierce looking when they performed like make my heart skip a beat. But when they're not wearing make up, they're just like you and me unless they have good genes then I can't say anything, lol. 

Let's start embracing our own unique beauty because beauty is subjective, no need to always chase for people's approval just as long as we're happy.

Wednesday, May 22, 2019

The Psychology of Being Poor

I recently watched this documentary on CNA Insider and then found out later that it was actually from a few years ago. But still, it gave the viewers a glimpse into the lives of those people living in rental flats, their struggles in life and how they were coping on government's welfare and social services rendered to them. Although this was a throwback series, the reality still remains that such groups of people do exist and by knowing more about their situations, we open up our minds and be more grateful that some problems we have in life, are not as big as compared to theirs.

Surprisingly, most of the comments weren't so nice by putting the blame on them that they brought this situation upon themselves. Honestly, I was also surprised why they had so many children, or keep adding to the brood, when they were already struggling to feed the children already. Imagine, having 7 children, on a $800 pay check and the fact that if he didn't work, he won't receive income since it was daily rated? And at that point of filming, they just had a one week old son. The younger twins, who were 18 months old, were already a handful and very active, plus with the older school going children, honestly, I would go crazy, haha. 

There were quite a lot of bashing on some of the families and I had a lot of hate for this husband who was so egoistic and lazy, even violent, and his excuses for working part time were so pathetic. The wife wasn't too far off, who worked part time in a  fast food restaurant as well despite her educational background, and she merely worked for two three times? And she was also pregnant at that time, even though, she wasn't so sure if she could provide the newborn a better life as she was already struggling to bring up her two young daughters.

I think the hate came about because the commenters were generally concerned for the children's well being, growing up in such environment can affect them psychologically. But amidst the concern, we also have to think about why they keep digging deeper into their undesirable situations, making it worse than it already had been, such as maybe due to lack of awareness or education. So instead of criticising them, we could perhaps do more by rendering emotional support and education such as financial literacy.

But it was also heartwarming to know that some of the families wanted to build better lives for themselves and their children because being this poor and struggling is very hard. And they don't want their children to end up like them with their checkered past of drug abuse and jail time. The past is in the past. Though it is a tough road ahead, eventually they can get out and have better life experiences instead of just existing. One of them was planning on taking up courses to get better job offers to better support her 6 children financially while the other worked hard enough to accumulate enough CPF money to buy a two bedroom flat. 

It comes down to choices. We can choose to remain like this or get out and slowly make ourselves out of this darkness and make better choices. Anyone can blame the situation we are in and sometimes, we do not choose to be in such situations but it doesn't mean that it is the end. We may not completely get out or it will take a very long time but at the very least, we can choose to make the situation more bearable or improve on it so that we do not always end up miserable and unhappy because there is more to life than just existing. 

Long Weekend, A Little Rambling & My Lack of Gratitude

The day I discover IG filters It's almost mid week to August..argh. I am in the midst of a long weekend, which sadly will come to ...