Sleepless at Home

Yesterday I kept waking up in the middle of the night thinking about how am I going to survive the week. I've got very little money left & it is going to be hard for me.

I hate going through such unnecessary turmoil. I've mentioned a few times how this year is so hard for me. I even maxed out my credit cards (but which luckily only have a 500 limit). I half regret getting those cards coz it made me owe money unnecessarily which I dislike. But I've got no choice coz I faced severe financial difficulties this year despite my some boosts like bonuses and all. I have limited my use on them and will plan to pay all & eventually cancel at least one or two by first quarter of next year.

But you know how life has a funny way of giving you a glimmer of hope at times especially in times of need? Well it did. It wasn't much I would say but to me, it still means a lot to me. I got a 20 dollar hongbao from my colleague. Honestly, I didn't expect it from them. I was hoping to get from my ops manager coz he gave me one last year. But despite the many hints, he did not give me one. I suspect coz last month I borrowed money from him & I had yet to return. Instead my other two colleagues gave me & I think that it is so sweet :)

I also got a huge blackforest cake & I think it was nice of them to give me the cake wholesale. I shared it with my family and coincidentally my mum's birthday is tomorrow (technically that would be today). Honestly I hardly buy cakes as it is too pricey for a lot of fluff. But the last couple of years I did get at least one for my brother coz previously he complained I didn't get for him. Luckily polar cakes still sell reasonably sized cakes for less than 20. Of course I try to get one as cheap as I could get so namely I would get around 17 plus.

So anyway, I always think that when you are sincere at heart, God will help. Even if you don't believe in God, believe in yourself that things will slowly get better.
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