I have recently known one person, a young woman to be precise, whom I admire her fearlessness in terms of she does what she wants or people can think of her as what they want coz she wouldn't even care anyway. She's not fearless like she'll jump into any ocean if you dare her, but just in case, we shall not dare her as well..hehe. She mingles around with everybody and doesn't choose whom she wants to get close with. Even for cleaners or school attendants, she'll just go ahead and interact with them and asked if everyone was okay. I knew her for some time but not as close coz she works in another section. It was funny when she tried to take a photo of the chili sauce and my colleague asked, why did she take the photo of the sauce, and her simple reply was that, well, it's free so she can just take a photo of it. And then, when she mispronounced a Chinese word to sound it like 'pink', and my colleague tried to correct her, she said, well she didn't care coz it's easier for her to understand and remember anyway. Then while other people, who had their lunch like an hour ago, and still full from them, she bought ice cream and just ate it in view of everyone coz she couldn't care less about it since it's not like every day she gets to eat a unique ice cream from Malaysia.
Interesting, eh? Far contrast from me who basically is calculative about what I eat and thinks too much about how I look, of which more than 90% of the time, I felt fat..heh. Who says you can't have the cake and eat it too? Like a fellow blogger said, you can remove the mirrors in your house, wear a pair of jeans in a size bigger, exercise more, but you just cannot let go of the opportunity to eat a good cake! True true..coz life is short.
So I'm slowly learning to not be so uptight over certain things especially over my weight though yes, in due time I still hope I can lose some kilos. But I felt that at the moment, I am trying my best, well most of the time anyway, to watch what I eat and exercise more if I have to, and see if my weight comes down. But I won't deprive myself and I will eat if I want to because can't always say no to good food, right? Meanwhile, I should learn to love myself, and not start loving myself when I get thinner coz you should be happy with yourself at any other time. Do what you can to make yourself feel better even if you have to lose some weight. Just don't be too caught up doing it that you forget to appreciate yourself for who you really are.
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