"Living Each Single Day"

I like to look pretty. Pfftt...Im a girl..DUH! But I dont like to stand out too much like 'hey, look at me!' Im probably one of those girls who doesnt do much of a maintenance but still try to cover up the basics, at least. Of course I do admire those who went for eyebrow threading, have their nails done by professionals, accessorise themselves, dress up well, use the nicest smelling shower gel, pamper themselves with rich lotion..well...such nice life. But I cant get that in my system..haha.. Im stressed out with trying to maintain my growing long hair..arghh..why cant there be an easier way?!! heh..*rubbing hands in glee*...why not..I ...CUt IT..muahahhaahaha!!.. ew..backtracking to the past here.. still, okay wat! easy maintenance..anyway, it is boring to be like the other girls. It's boring trying to dress up a bit and it is getting tiring to put on concealer on my pimple scars and drawing on my eyebrows to give them an existence. It is hard to maintain kissable lips bu...

mariah!! Our new video! Ey, I look good....

you know what i realise about myself..okay i realised it long ago but it never kinda occur to me all the time...that Im a pretty rebellious person but in my own way. Some people make their rebellious streak obvious to show tat they cannot be trifled with. This realisation came when I found a picture of myself with three other gals and we called ourselves the Eastern babes in the picture taken in March 06 last year because we are like the young 'uns in the group. I stood out coz I was obviously bigger than them and that I had short hair. But instead of bringing happiness that I found such a rare photo of myself with them taken last year, it reminded me of how I used to be treated by the guys at the work place. Apart from them, the worst treatment I received was my ex drivers. They were never nice to me but I did get the impression then that okay fine..Im not as pretty or slim as these girls...so like what..u want to hold it against me? I was already being nice to them as i know thei...

I dont know what is my fate later..am I gonna get screamed at by my friend who thought that I could not decipher what the crap she's talking about. Like in other words...Im no GeeK! I dont speak GeeK language! dammit..i understood...im just diverting your attention. DO you know that the winner of the recent tv I.T. programme isnt a geek at all in the first place? She doesnt do computer geeky stuffs and yet! She gets to visit the microsoft headquarters..yes..THE headquarters..where sir bill gates calls his shot. Why? Because she is creative and innovative. While geeks tend to hide in their silly little cubicles working hard and have problem socialising..heh..taking a dig at them here....she grasps things, puts in her input based on her own self creativity rather than churning out loads of information from thick computer books and sell out her ideas. Basically, she delivers what people..the people you see on the streets whose knowledge on I.T. is not necessarily sky high..really want...

This is gonna be a never ending battle again. So she looks down on me...said I earned peanuts and to her, my work is nothing so I got no right to feel tired after work. This despite having to rush to work, and then stand in the bus or train, rush my field work coz we got time to keep to, and then have lunch followed by more rushing to work and again..up on my feet. When my eyes could not open around 10 plus coz my brother always have to start his homework late, it becomes my fault. If I get his maths homework wrong, it is my fault. If he cant finish his homework and then I have to help him figure the last two or three coz he's getting sleepy, nevermind..he can jolly well sleep. Can serve him toasted peanut butter bread pieces some more walking back and forth from the kitchen to my room but instead of checking on him, will check on me if Im making sure he's doing his work while she herself make sure Im not fooling around on the internet. OH, I have the right to play here what..I...

Ow!! My Eyes!! My burning EYES!!!!!... Gawd I just spent the entire night..(er..minus 3 hours in between coz I thought of sleeping for awhile and overshot..hehe..) doing this website for my friend's so called client who is a student at her campus but apparently is too busy to do up the website for his project work. Wah, all the technicalities in the word document she passed to me was enough for me to give up the project. 17 pages leh and she made it sound like it's terribly easy. Can't blame her though. We're talking to a computer engineering student here who is now doing research in I.T. at some firm and has been assigned 25 files to code. So I cant complain about doing the coding for this website which she said is the very basic of all. Easy for you to say! I dont code stuffs everyday! She gave me a few days' grace even though she said that the draft itself would take less than one hour..pfft...once again, I dont go to a school like her. Good thing I managed to w...

Yup, I was messaging Mariah about what my covering partner thought about Dennis. She came back from maternity last March and only met him much later than us but only for that one week she was doing coverage. But she didn't think of him like some God-sent gift unlike the rest of us..hehe...and she was more surprised why our older colleagues are so into him as if thinking, what the heck is so handsome about him? I mean..in a way..yes she thought he is good looking but just average lah..not hormone inducing enough. FINALLY! Someone who doesnt worship him. Ey, I dont either okay although I did think he's good looking but not so crazy like calling him every now and then asking about some street directions, which door to go into when out to schools for field visits or to bring to the nearest food centre..and then asking him a lot of personal questions about his life. Come to think of it, I never asked him in that line either including his age, where he lived, studied..blah de blah bl...

I read about mariah's mini dilemma in not wanting to go to the chalet that is in the midst of being organized by our deal ol' nats. SHe's old coz she just turned a year older..geddit? heh..gawd i still have her lameness. I kinda shared the same thoughts as her that I actually am scared..yes...scared...to go to the chalet. Scared because Im gonna meet people, no wait...my old friends...for some gathering. Now isnt that unusual? Well, people change and I have moved on. I cant just say they changed coz I have changed too whether physically or mentally and Im not about ready to face them with these 'changes'. Maybe they are to show the world and us their new changes with their little babies or boyfriends or a new career but Im just not. But then when I think about it, every gathering that I went to, I did feel out of place so it didn't really matter to me. They didn't really talk much with me except asking the usual questions and I would usually just be talking ...

wah....just as i thought i wanted to start on a new clean slate with this dennis thingey...like totally dont want to be like a friend but a mere colleague, he had to message me in the morning and played a prank on me and laughed at my expense coz he didnt see me around when delivering his things. But I pretended to be all angry with him saying not to let him show his face infront of me and ignored his existence for awhile later by asking who is he...I dont know anyone else with his name as the last one was screwed already. He sent me two pathetic smses saying 'wei...sorry lah..i just want to scare you and give you a morning wake up call' and again 'wei......' haha, he sounded like a sheep begging not to be slaughtered. Oh well..and later I tried to recompose myself and be all 'serious sounding' like how I used to be with him for few months when I had to get things from him or he had to come over to collect things. But usually I had to call him again second time ...

Hey, wow...when it comes to healthy living, Singapore is a bit the backward and now the buzz word is 'trans fat' when the whole of America probably knows its existence already. What the hell is trans fat? According to this pamphlet...(I shall go all technical about it).. 'Trans fat is a type of fat which is formed when liquid oils are changed into more stable semisolid fats, such as shortening and hard margarine. This process is known as hydrogenation.' 'Trans fat is also produced by the normal action of bacteria in the stomach of cows and sheep.' 'The main sources of trans fat in our diet are pastries, cakes, cookies, biscuits, commercially deep-fried foods as well as products containing vegetable shortening and hydrogenated or partially hydrogenated oils'. What's so bad about trans fat which is unlike saturated fats which if you dont know by now..is one of the worst form of fats..well..here's the deal. It turns good cholesterol into bad cholest...

My heart goes out to the families of the victims of a crazed shooter that went on a shooting rampage at the virginia tech. Now what saddened me is tat this was not meant to be a sporadic attack out of nowhere since there were signs showing this kid was troubled. Even when a shooting incident happened which obviously would endanger the lives of other students and staff should a second one happened again, they chose to keep it under the rug. What happened? The next thirty something people fell victim. Is this how we view such a serious problem here? People's lives are involved here and Im very sure people of such high intelligent quotient are able to know that first hand. The issue is not just about the easy availability of guns. It is about dealing with a small issue before it escalates into such a nationwide tragedy which is already too late coz people have died in the hands of a crazed lonely guy. I know how it feels to be an outcast. YOu just dont fit in. Contrary to what others ...

Hey... this is totally out of context but american guys are just so beefed up..heh..ANYWAY, what is it about guys that make us SO Freakin attracted to them? Still, I realised that not all guys make my cup of tea. And I lOVE tea. If guys want to hurt you, they dont care if you're gorgeous or you're popular, if they want to move on with other ladies, they will. What happen to these fine young ladies especially those who are in the midst of growing up? They become attention seekers. Meaning, they will do anything to get attention from guys and it becomes like an addiction to want something so bad and they will do anything to get it even by behaving like a...pardon my language....a slut at an age where they should be studying and planning for their future career. To them, who cares if the guy will for sure move on to other girls or he is a creephead. Just as long as they know they feel wanted whether with their body or their looks, they feel accepted even for awhile coz it doesnt ...

You know what I forsee? I forsee tat I'll be dateless for the next..I dunno...donkey years? And it's not the case I thought that I am not attractive enough or I dont deserve a date but like I said, my life is rather complicated right now where Im still trying to find a foothold as everything is pretty much not in order. As much as I appreciate people's 'concern' that I should go out and meet people...especially...guys....I just thought that it is best they stay out of my affair. If they meant it as a joke to hook me up with so-and-so, okay fine....I can joke along too but if it turns out to be a little bit more serious than that, then Im sorry I can only take the 'joke' so far. I know I have said that my current family's situation dont allow me to socialise but it isn't fair to blame them either coz it is not as if they asked for it. In regards to my mum, I apologised for saying rather nasty things to her previously. I know that she is still my mum n...

I felt sad writing the last entry coz she was the aunty who was always there for the family but whose last days were spent thinking that her own relatives could not help her in times of her needs. It was not that we could not help...actually, we did offer her help in ways that we can by giving some money when we visit but we could not go beyond that like giving her few hundred dollars to help pay for this or that coz we ourselves were struggling. But what made my mum and my younger aunt angrier was that her children were simply idling their time away and even spend money on their significant others but either didnt give her money at all or merely gave her 40 to 50 bucks. Still she wont scold her children and that made my younger aunt known for her temper always flaring up and scolding my aunt years older than her for pampering her children too much. My mum played it cool and wont resort to scolding but for such a calm person, she at times could not help but tell her children off in a g...

Hello, am i like the only one who greets people on my blog whether or not people reaD. Anyway, I wanna tell one serious, one funnie..and uhm...whatever I can think of. Basicaly, it's just a mish mash as-per-usual sort of thing. First, serious. I want to offer my condolences to my late auntie's family. She passed away yesterday's evening at her home. As much as my parents wanted me to come, I could not make it coz my partner was on leave and I had to work with a floater or a replacement. And the thing is, since she was just there for coverage, I could not let her handle the work alone coz each field work for different team was unique so it would be unfair for her to come from far and not able to do anything. I felt bad of course and I said I would make it up by going to the prayers ceremony if they were gonna have one. But my mum said she was not gonna go to it coz she did not want anything to do with her children anymore. She kinda blamed her children for her passing coz f...

Hello!! I sound bright and cheery but actually am suffering from a bout of flu whose flow right now...is not under control just yet. Yup. It comes as and when it likes and almost most of the time the tissue comes for the rescue a bit too late. why the flu when I have been trying to take care of my body? Coz I realised my body cant take drinks that is WAY too cold. Read: with lots of ice. Ey, why this reaction man? Can someone enjoy a very cold red bean corn ice kachang drink and then three days later a chocolate ice cream milkshake topped up with chocolate ice cream. Next day: flu. Wah piang! Give me a break! Anyway I know they ruin any diets but it's an occasional treat. Okay so I know my few entries are just about that darn driver of mine whom i-have-no-idea...decides to be so darn friendly with me barely two weeks before I get sent to boot camp at Woodlands Poly. No Rahayu....be a strong woman....he'll probably just decide to quit and follow his dream of becoming a sales eng...

you wanna know what I think about this whole dennis 'affair'? So initially me and M...but still M though...thought what a big loss that this Dennis is married coz he has been extra friendly to me recently..and a bit the 'extra' too..pfft...twenty years old..yeah right. But when I keep on thinking about it and the kind of questions he shoots me, I guess that it is better that he IS married. Why? This may sound a weetle (a wee little) bit illogical or a weetle bit 'huh?' later to you but let me explain. The thing is, the minute he drops his colleague guard against me and now treats me like one of his friends, I have been receiving an entourage of questions that kinda make ME question where I stand. Yes I know my stand is to not be so freaking flirtatious with a married man...tat is a confirmed stand. What I really meant is that it made me question myself as in....what kind of person I am and what I should be working on to improve myself for a better social life es...

Yes...unfortunately, the flirting continues. And I stand FIRMLy with my stand that nope, I didn't do anything to provoke the flirtatious moments in my sorry bid to continue with my mind purification thingey..heh..yes, M...Im still in the running for it. Chey, I sound like im running for some presidency post. I still stuck on to the 'oh hi' mode and looked away and messaging my friend while looking at the mirror to comb my hair and he was in his usual work mode too saying eh, I bring this stand over to the van first k? I noticed him giving me the look as if thinking..so..thats it? Just hi? nothing more? and I thought i nailed it coz seriously, dont want to be the one starting any flirting moments or what. He came back later doing his usual stuffs and I still didn't look at him but just started packing my bag. He came over to me with the exercise book and said 'miss, i need your autograph..' coz usually my partner would sign the book since she was always the first...

heylo, I just wanted to say that gawd I felt like I was 'flirting' with the driver over the phone...and man..I should be banned from answering the team phone! Well...dunno who started first but I want to say this, IF i ever caught myself flirting with him over the phone again, you'd be damned rahyu....be damned! No, it wasn't the typical flirt sort..I wouldnt even be calling it flirting even. But it's just a casual friendly teasing..err..conversation that didn't lead to anywhere, trust me! And I know God's actual reason for sending me to the clinic for attachment for the next two months. To aid in my failing mind purification (damn it....I almost nailed it!), I think that is the best move for me. With a married guy? Hello Rahayu?!! If he is always on my mind, that's it man. I might just need to be celibate for the rest of my life! Let's do some quick recalling as to how the conversation went. Normally, I dont answer the phone coz my partner is the l...