My mum went hysterical yesterday. She was at a stage where she refused to listen to me...but thats a norm anyway. I mean....sometimes I dont know what she wants or what is she trying to say coz she's always denying. And she's always turning that denial into words of anger and frustration. Then who becomes a victim? Me. Yes, yours truly...Sometimes I am so sick and tired of trying to please her and telling her to calm down whenever she is frustrated with my father and then yesterday, when he went missing again, and even though she knew where he went, she still made such a big ruckus out of it. She didnt think rationally and she started to disbelieve me and asked me the same questions over and over again like all the answers are at my fingertips. She even made me messaged my step cousin again almost 1230 in the middle of the night when he didnt respond to my earlier message about 10.30pm. She made my brother checked my phone as to whether I did send the message and forced me to actually call him up to ask for his house number because she wanted to call my aunt who is my father's youngest sister. Like come on, for God's sake it is 12 plus in the morning! She said she didnt care..blah blah blah...and thank goodness as I scrolled through my handphone I managed to find the house number. I can bet you my mum wont call her up later this morning. I know it's just one of her illogical...nonsensical.....moments when she just give in to her emotions.
To me, it's logical enough for him not to tell her his whereabouts because they are already not on speaking terms and if my father talks to her, she ignores him. And then day in day out she complains over the telephone about him even though he's just doing his daily activities of eating, napping, sleeping and watching television in his room without any noise but every day, it's like a cold war over at my house.
But when that storm is over and her rationale thinking comes back, she can talk about other things like everything is back to normal. She was conjuring up what to cook for my colleagues. I was like..come on.....at a time like this when my budget is so freaking tight, she wanted to cook for a few number of them. And then back home, she hardly cooks or wait..she doesnt cook at all. Of course, I want to thank my colleagues for indirectly inspiring my mum to cook whenever I go back home and tell her what an array of food my colleagues had brought from home for breakfast and lunch.
She also baked cookies and made corn pudding but the latter me and my brother walloped it before it reached my office premises..hee. It's nice lah but she didnt add jelly so it's a bit soft. THen again, we dont care! Hahaha...I love my mum's cooking, frankly speaking. This morning she made fried mee or mee goreng and even though I've sworn off yellow mee..well, sort of..since she wants to cook yellow mee, well I just let her cook coz I think it's easier for her. Just 'throw' everything into the wok.
I always tell myself that nobody is perfect....not even me. My mum is the extreme sort..her character is like a pendulum. It doesnt stop in the middle but always pause at the ends.
Of course sometimes she talks at the wrong moments when Im watching tv or on the pc but no matter what, I have to focus on her when she talks or she will get angry. It's very distracting for me especially during the critical moments on the show and I get pissed off if I lose focus half way watching the show. But I'd rather miss those critical moments than incur her wrath later....sighz.....
Right now, Im blogging via email to avoid suspicions that I got a blog. And Im quite freaking bored right now. The only comfort I get is reading and gawking at the profiles of the male models a.k.a hunks of the Janice Dickinson Modelling Agency. Cheap thrill...but not all of them are immature with the typical model attitude. I kinda like one of them whose background profile and stories are quite fascinating and emotionally charged. See, even a guy with such a perfect torso has moments of insecurities like 'i hate myself' moments. You also get to see another side of Janice and she's like a 'mum' to him.
Maybe I should feature him, eh?!
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