the other time i wanted to write some serious stuffs on my blog. well...you know how im always short of cash when it comes to spending for my family coz it's not easiy taking care of one..i can tell you that. i guess thats why im quite reluctant to start my own family because im not that up to it. now that my father is also taking his medicine regularly, every month i have to make my way to the hospital to get his medicine supply. it's not something that i mind..really....but it can be a financial burden. i was so lucky..and i asked God to help me out that hopefully the doctor would see him last monday even though his appointment had been pushed forward to august. it was the earliest date that they could give. my cashflow was so low that i had to change the previous appointment date and i was reluctant to do so knowing that his medicine supply will be affected as it was running low. the pharmacy would only release the medicine upon instruction by the doctor. I cant just go there happy happy demand the medicine that he often consume.
And then, my cashflow improved and it is something that im very very thankful about and with great sense of nervousness, I made my way there to the hospital with my father on the monday that we did not have an appointment. I knew the risk was quite high for them to turn us away since it was only based on appointments but I had no other choice. But to cut the story short, the doctor agreed to see us and even though the wait was longer than usual as she had to clear the cases for that morning first, I was very happy that she was able to give yet another three months supply of medicine and everything was so called returned to normal.
I would say that it had been tough for me for the last few months but earlier this month onwards, I am able to breathe a bit. SO much so that I kinda..uhm....let months of pent up frustration of very very very little shopping to be released..haha. But I dont go so over the top over it. Right..I almost did but you know how shopping had this feel good factor and I finally got to relive the happiness of obtaining the things that I had been pining for months or for over a year plus even. I mean..if you have a family to take care of, you tend to prioritise quite a lot and had to make sacrifices that include not being to get the things that you wanted. I was in that position. But maybe God just wanted to give me a reward or something for being almost out of my mind thinking how my family was going to survive on mere dollars.
For now, I dont have to worry much about that and Im pretty much done with the shopping and right now trying my best to stick with what is more important and that is food on the table. But even with grocery shopping, I dont have to be so freaking calculative over every little cent and have a wee bit of freedom when it comes to choosing the items. However, I guess that after months of being calculative, it is a little bit hard to shrug off which is good I think coz it keeps me in touch with reality. Yes initially I got lost a bit in my world of 'i want that!! no..i want that one instead!' and got er..more than a pair of shoes..and more than one bag..(but good thing they come in different sizes..haha..talk about being economical! same with shoes too..). Please dont see me any differently after I say this like Im carrying it too far or what but...i got myself some stuffs considered as..er 'branded'. DOnt get me wrong..these things I got were after careful analysis as to how much I have and how much I would have left and there was plenty left so it was safe to get them. It's not the spur of the moment thing.
And one of things Im happy about is that..I dont have to worry about transport money anymore. You know what...even topping up 1o dollars for my ez link card was not an option. Yes, it was that bad.
But then again, you know the deal.......good things may not last forever and before that day comes when I suffer yet again, Im taking things nice and slow now already. I hope my mother understand my position too and not get herself carried too far also. I know she has so called cravings like me for certain things and it is only times like this that she is able to get or the opportunity will not come again. But I guess she has also learned to be more balanced in terms of spending as family still comes first.
One more time, I thank God for our current financial position and even though we're not rich and im not talking about thousands of dollars even, it's at least enough to support my family till my next pay. This used to be one heck of a struggle especially come the second week..IF..I am lucky. So yah....that's just the serious entry I've been wanting to write about especially about that hospital visit. I am very very grateful that we did not get turn away. I dont quite feel like a failur to my father anymore and the cloud that had been covering me ever since the day I decided to change the appointment date had disappeared. At least my father's supply of medicine has not been interrupted.
And then, my cashflow improved and it is something that im very very thankful about and with great sense of nervousness, I made my way there to the hospital with my father on the monday that we did not have an appointment. I knew the risk was quite high for them to turn us away since it was only based on appointments but I had no other choice. But to cut the story short, the doctor agreed to see us and even though the wait was longer than usual as she had to clear the cases for that morning first, I was very happy that she was able to give yet another three months supply of medicine and everything was so called returned to normal.
I would say that it had been tough for me for the last few months but earlier this month onwards, I am able to breathe a bit. SO much so that I kinda..uhm....let months of pent up frustration of very very very little shopping to be released..haha. But I dont go so over the top over it. Right..I almost did but you know how shopping had this feel good factor and I finally got to relive the happiness of obtaining the things that I had been pining for months or for over a year plus even. I mean..if you have a family to take care of, you tend to prioritise quite a lot and had to make sacrifices that include not being to get the things that you wanted. I was in that position. But maybe God just wanted to give me a reward or something for being almost out of my mind thinking how my family was going to survive on mere dollars.
For now, I dont have to worry much about that and Im pretty much done with the shopping and right now trying my best to stick with what is more important and that is food on the table. But even with grocery shopping, I dont have to be so freaking calculative over every little cent and have a wee bit of freedom when it comes to choosing the items. However, I guess that after months of being calculative, it is a little bit hard to shrug off which is good I think coz it keeps me in touch with reality. Yes initially I got lost a bit in my world of 'i want that!! no..i want that one instead!' and got er..more than a pair of shoes..and more than one bag..(but good thing they come in different sizes..haha..talk about being economical! same with shoes too..). Please dont see me any differently after I say this like Im carrying it too far or what but...i got myself some stuffs considered as..er 'branded'. DOnt get me wrong..these things I got were after careful analysis as to how much I have and how much I would have left and there was plenty left so it was safe to get them. It's not the spur of the moment thing.
And one of things Im happy about is that..I dont have to worry about transport money anymore. You know what...even topping up 1o dollars for my ez link card was not an option. Yes, it was that bad.
But then again, you know the deal.......good things may not last forever and before that day comes when I suffer yet again, Im taking things nice and slow now already. I hope my mother understand my position too and not get herself carried too far also. I know she has so called cravings like me for certain things and it is only times like this that she is able to get or the opportunity will not come again. But I guess she has also learned to be more balanced in terms of spending as family still comes first.
One more time, I thank God for our current financial position and even though we're not rich and im not talking about thousands of dollars even, it's at least enough to support my family till my next pay. This used to be one heck of a struggle especially come the second week..IF..I am lucky. So yah....that's just the serious entry I've been wanting to write about especially about that hospital visit. I am very very grateful that we did not get turn away. I dont quite feel like a failur to my father anymore and the cloud that had been covering me ever since the day I decided to change the appointment date had disappeared. At least my father's supply of medicine has not been interrupted.
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