A Chance to Make Things Better

I didn't really have a chance to talk about the update in my life recently after facing such a huge turmoil that I just am so mind blocked because I didn't know what to do. I did a quick blog post the other day but I felt that this period of time deserved a longer post. I couldn't be more thankful for the reimbursement, which I seriously had doubts that I was going to get which made me so panicky and worried until I fell ill. Even though it was an impromptu decision to ask them for the reimbursement because I seriously thought that I would have enough until payday, turned out I won't which increased my desperateness. Normally I would get the reimbursement but what made this different from the earlier ones was that, I didn't pay it with my own cash. That was the difference which I was seriously hoping they didn't find out. I was practically lying through my teeth when I said I did and that was why I panicked in the event they found out.


So I was scared to talk about it here. Completely scared that I was constantly praying that things would get better and they would just reimburse the money after they asked a series of questions. But I was also quick to acknowledge that I would not want to do such a thing anymore, lest they find out and I get into trouble with the law. I never felt like such a criminal before.


I did try my best to follow up with what I planned to do with the money once I got it. I felt satisfied that I did. While yes I promised not to use the money to buy make up, I er, did but am already on the way of saving up the amount that I spent on using coins and then putting the money back into the bank account. I am careful about spending but I can't afford not to spend on my family since today is Hari Raya Haji and my mum wanted to cook some special food for us. 


With my aunt not being able to return the money to us, the money couldn't have come at a better time and I can never thank enough for the help I received from God whom I prayed endlessly for Him to help my family during such a crisis. Even if you don't believe in God like I said, do believe that when you are sincere in your heart and only have good intentions, things can get better for you.

On another note, I've watched a lot of beauty videos and read a lot of beauty blogs because I simply love make up but sometimes I think these young girls deserve to put their money to better use rather than buy make up after make up. They're at an impressionable age where make up is everything to them because it can really help to enhance their looks. Same sentiments here but when I was younger, or rather around their age coz pfft, I'm still young, buying make up was sooooo hard for me. My father didn't give me a lot of pocket money. And he made it up for me by packing bread for me for school almost every day. Now my mum also packs for me lunch and even made one whole bottle of tea for me even when I have started to work and can afford to buy lunch myself.

So I basically know the hardship of not having enough money and the last thing I do is to of course, buy clothes and make up. I only do so if I have some excess money but even then, I am very selective over what I can buy so that I don't end up with bad buys and waste money. So while you hear me rant about my make up items, like how I shouldn't have bought them but the truth is that, I didn't spend much. I tried to buy those cheap but good quality eyeshadow palettes or blushes online from overseas through a local seller rather than buying from the local drugstores because they are way cheaper. It cuts down the guilt of me buying make up as well.

 There are still a few items that I want to get like the Sleek's oh-so-special eye makeup palette but still thinking because it costs $22 and it begs the question of whether do I still need another one since I hardly ever use eyeshadows...hrm. Blushes, well..considering I do wear them when I go out (but not to work), I don't really feel guilty buying them since Sleek ones cost $12, again through this one local seller, Elf has some collection of blushes which another local seller is selling at only $7. Still, I only have one such blush from each one of them. See, I don't collect them. It's just that sometimes people rave about them so much and then considering how cheap yet how big they are unlike the blush from Silkygirl which is cheap but when I compared, they are like so small :S


See, even if you are poor like me, you deserve to be pampered like a queen :) You just need to know how at a fraction of a price. But do not be so overly enthusiastic about make up because for one thing, they can contain ingredients that may aggravate your skin condition especially if you have young skin or sensitive skin. Good proper habits of skincare is way better. Honestly these girls, if they didn't disclose their age, I would have thought they were about the same age as me but I was surprised to know they were way younger. Even they acknowledged they looked older than their actual age. So in a way, I guess you need to take better care of your skin rather than just relying on make up after make up to mask your actual natural beauty :) So even though not all of us are blessed with good skin, which is like 95% of us, do try to use make up sparingly if possible.

Okay I better get to work with making accessories. I am thinking of black and gold combination because I saw a girl on youtube I think wearing that colour combination and I thought it looked good. Shall see how. Until the next time...




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