You have no idea how I have been suffering up to yesterday, lol...being cooped up in the school library from morning until night, clocking almost 12 hours! From Monday to Wednesday, just for the sake of sitting for one paper on Thursday. Of course, there's more to come and I will be continuing to endure this suffering for at least until the following Thursday.
*Gasp*
Up to one point, I began hallucinating, like seriously. I began to have the feeling of regret, like why am I torturing myself with this, when I don't need to. I still have a job, and they don't put me at gunpoint to go study. If I want to, I can stay within this comfort level, for AS LONG as I want to.
But what gives. It's me wanting to get out of this comfort zone and to be able to try out a new job scope and also, to hold something that I thought I would never ever be able to get due to my dire financial situations. It's because also, I want to get out of this situation, I set myself up on this continual learning journey.
So, I managed to quickly get out from this hallucination and feelings of being demotivated, especially during times when I absorbed so much info and forgetting about the info the next moment. I got demoralised when I looked at the past year paper and then my goodness, I studied this but...
WHAT WAS IT AGAIN?
I felt like if I can't jolly well answer this one miserable question, how can I possibly answer the whole God damn paper?!
But somehow, just as the feelings of regret overcame me, the feelings of 'I can do this' quickly took over. I realized that I must strategically plan my time and attempt the past year papers just to get my confidence level up again. And it worked. Practising the exam paper, took away that element of surprise because it felt as though I was doing the actual paper. I know this isn't a top secret back then when I was doing full time studying in order to do better. But with my full time job and my online shop, it gets even harder keeping my energy level up especially after finishing the class at night.
I shift my focus from just cramming info inside my head without any clear directions, to being able to answer the exam questions confidently. I re-read my notes again and this time, clearly knowing and expecting what sort of questions they are likely to ask and being able to nail them.
Suddenly all the info made more sense and I also ensured that I know the linkages between the different topics rather than just looking at them as mere individual topics. Also, it helps to also have a clear focus on what grade you want to get. I felt like I could possibly get an A for business law judging by how some people did so well for the tests scoring close to full marks. I sorta expected to get those dismal marks for the earlier tests, which is still a pass nonetheless but not as good as them of course. I am someone who takes a longer time to digest info and yet I studied like a day before the test only. While it works for some people to cram on the very day they have the test and still score almost full marks, I'm not in that league. My brain is slower I guess, lol.
Of course, I'm pretty much like many of my classmates of just wanting to pass and get that damn cert but yah I know at the back of their mind, if they were to get a certain grade, I know they would be happy but also, not-so-happy. My sentiments were proven when one of them was remarking how he was happy but yet, judging on how he did so well for the test, only to go down three notches of the grade after the exam for that particular subject.
Now, I am having trouble with one of the papers, which is the last paper before freedom looms over my head for the next couple of months. I have been studying but when the revision questions were put up on the slides, I sunk lower and lower because out of the MANY questions he posted, I only managed to answer one. It doesn't help that the model answers given were so long winded and we spent most of our time in the tutorials, snapping photos of the answers and vigorously writing down, lol.
So from this Saturday until Wednesday, my exam preparations will be intense. I know what grade I plan to get, although this time round it's definitely not an A, haha...that's how confident I am of NOT getting it. If I could just get a B, life will be so sweet. B+ would be a bonus.
I've got two main goals. Get the modular cert and not to get a C.
So that's one area to focus already. My other area of focus, knowing what the heck I'm studying for the Human Resource Management, lol...which also, isn't any of my classmates' favourite subject. We were all sharing how we hated it to an extent of hating the lecturer too, who isn't very motivating, in contrast to the subject he was teaching.
I shall begin downloading info in a bit later at night. You'll hear from me soon, once I'm done with this thing callednightmare exams.
follow me on http://instagram.com/rahayupopz
*Gasp*
Up to one point, I began hallucinating, like seriously. I began to have the feeling of regret, like why am I torturing myself with this, when I don't need to. I still have a job, and they don't put me at gunpoint to go study. If I want to, I can stay within this comfort level, for AS LONG as I want to.
But what gives. It's me wanting to get out of this comfort zone and to be able to try out a new job scope and also, to hold something that I thought I would never ever be able to get due to my dire financial situations. It's because also, I want to get out of this situation, I set myself up on this continual learning journey.
So, I managed to quickly get out from this hallucination and feelings of being demotivated, especially during times when I absorbed so much info and forgetting about the info the next moment. I got demoralised when I looked at the past year paper and then my goodness, I studied this but...
WHAT WAS IT AGAIN?
I felt like if I can't jolly well answer this one miserable question, how can I possibly answer the whole God damn paper?!
But somehow, just as the feelings of regret overcame me, the feelings of 'I can do this' quickly took over. I realized that I must strategically plan my time and attempt the past year papers just to get my confidence level up again. And it worked. Practising the exam paper, took away that element of surprise because it felt as though I was doing the actual paper. I know this isn't a top secret back then when I was doing full time studying in order to do better. But with my full time job and my online shop, it gets even harder keeping my energy level up especially after finishing the class at night.
I shift my focus from just cramming info inside my head without any clear directions, to being able to answer the exam questions confidently. I re-read my notes again and this time, clearly knowing and expecting what sort of questions they are likely to ask and being able to nail them.
Suddenly all the info made more sense and I also ensured that I know the linkages between the different topics rather than just looking at them as mere individual topics. Also, it helps to also have a clear focus on what grade you want to get. I felt like I could possibly get an A for business law judging by how some people did so well for the tests scoring close to full marks. I sorta expected to get those dismal marks for the earlier tests, which is still a pass nonetheless but not as good as them of course. I am someone who takes a longer time to digest info and yet I studied like a day before the test only. While it works for some people to cram on the very day they have the test and still score almost full marks, I'm not in that league. My brain is slower I guess, lol.
Of course, I'm pretty much like many of my classmates of just wanting to pass and get that damn cert but yah I know at the back of their mind, if they were to get a certain grade, I know they would be happy but also, not-so-happy. My sentiments were proven when one of them was remarking how he was happy but yet, judging on how he did so well for the test, only to go down three notches of the grade after the exam for that particular subject.
Now, I am having trouble with one of the papers, which is the last paper before freedom looms over my head for the next couple of months. I have been studying but when the revision questions were put up on the slides, I sunk lower and lower because out of the MANY questions he posted, I only managed to answer one. It doesn't help that the model answers given were so long winded and we spent most of our time in the tutorials, snapping photos of the answers and vigorously writing down, lol.
So from this Saturday until Wednesday, my exam preparations will be intense. I know what grade I plan to get, although this time round it's definitely not an A, haha...that's how confident I am of NOT getting it. If I could just get a B, life will be so sweet. B+ would be a bonus.
I've got two main goals. Get the modular cert and not to get a C.
So that's one area to focus already. My other area of focus, knowing what the heck I'm studying for the Human Resource Management, lol...which also, isn't any of my classmates' favourite subject. We were all sharing how we hated it to an extent of hating the lecturer too, who isn't very motivating, in contrast to the subject he was teaching.
I shall begin downloading info in a bit later at night. You'll hear from me soon, once I'm done with this thing called
follow me on http://instagram.com/rahayupopz
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