Finding Love When You Least Expect it

A blog post I read got me thinking and well, probably a Japanese tv movie too that I watched might have influenced this thought - that love will find us where we least expect it and provide us with happiness that we thought we will never get because of our tormented past and our self hatred.

There are people who are looking for their soul mate and there are also those, that took on a wait-and-see approach and just let nature take its course. There's also a small group, and I find myself in this group, that it can never happen to me.

I know for a fact that I've not opened up myself to the possibility of falling in love or someone finding me as a potential love interest. That's why the universe pretty much respond to me in the same manner; that it's simply not doing anything because I asked for it as I see no future in it. 

But I'm just a girl. As much as I resisted, there is a small part of me longing to be noticed. Not loved, but simply noticed. Because it will make me feel as though there is something special about me after all.Obviously, I do have thoughts that perhaps I'm just not attractive enough to elicit a 'love at first sight' moment. I see other people and I will think, no wonder they can find people. Just look at them. Look at me

Of course, the universe is also kind enough to show me another side of it that you don't have to be what the society perceive to be the ideal beauty to find true love.

If you can find someone who still find us as beautiful even if we're not looking our best, take care of us when we're sick in bed, protect us from harm, and fall in love with us every day, even as you grow old together, then that's true love.

Love can indeed find us when we least expect it. The unpleasant past that has been holding us back from trusting anyone again and our own inner demons telling us that we're not good enough and that  our life is but a waste of space on earth. That love, if we open our hearts to it, can make us better than we are right now by giving us happiness and knowing that we don't have to live in darkness and in sadness in this world that can sometimes be cold and heartless. 

I feel like I'm writing some sad manga storyline, haha, since that particular Japanese drama was based on some popular manga comic. I'm still not open to the idea of finding love but just like how the future is uncertain, perhaps I will find love when I least expect it, eh?

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