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Not Gone from Good

Life hasn't been good lately especially in the last two weeks. The latest news is that it seems that almost everyone has an increase in their pay due to changes in the civil servant wage scale and very unfortunately, my group didn't get it. So my boss, whose post is that of a manager and the operations manager, have quite a significant salary rise.  I heard she got a 10% pay rise. 10%!!! look, even the attendants got a pay rise. What we got? nada! zilch! Why? Because apparently our salary is of a competitive range.


Sigh, such is the unfairness of life. I'm already struggling as it is and then apparently now, the rich has become richer. The poor remains nothing but a destitute mess. So I guess the only chance for a pay rise is for me to be promoted and though I do not know how much pay rise will that be, at least it is going to be slightly better. The problem is that I have no clue when I will get promoted. I am not one of those people with many super ideas that will greatly enhance the productivity of work. Basically I am just one of your regular workers. Plus I will be competing for a spot of promotion with many other officers in the same ministry and we are the second largest ministry. You can imagine the significance of that.


Apart from that, I was also devastated that end of January, we found out that my brother didn't manage to get to any polytechnics. We tried to make our way down to the polytechnics but they proved to be fruitless. My poor brother. He refused to go to the ITE so I emailed on his behalf to the school for a second chance for him to repeat his o level studies. The only relief was that he could go back to school again after the release of the appeal results.


It was such a depressing and exhausting moment for us. Although I had reminded him time and time again the importance of the O level, of which he did study but then there was absolute stiff competition. 


I hope when he gets to go back to school, I hope that he will do better even though I may have to spend some money on providing him tuition so that he can do well in his Maths and not get turned away from polytechnics again.


Then remember last year my finances were in such a mess that I predict that it is not going to recover immediately. I guess it will take time but I just hope to clear my debt asap so that I no longer get such unnecessary calls. I may have to spend lesser but my main concentration is on trying to make some money. Even $50 per month is fine by me for now to just clear my debt, or what they call in the business, to 'break even'. I need to re-shift back my focus on what I truly want out of my life instead of just idling it away. There are so many inspirational young women out there who do not start off with a silver spoon in the mouth or have to slog her way to make life better and yet they have made it. I want to be like that.


So I started on this new project that takes up some of my time after work starting from Monday. After years of putting this hobby off, I have restarted it. I have started to make DIY cards and they're so pretty. More on that in the next post. I hope to start making and selling them for some moolah. I believe there is a market for this because it is all about creativity and the personal touch. It's not like your average greeting card. We'll see. 


I want to also ensure that I do not stray from my goal to be more fit and lose more weight as it has been taking far too long for me to see any form of progress. I have lost my motivation and I want to get it back. I can indulge but most times I want to 'think healthy'. Medical costs are rising and they mostly provide healthcare costs to those who are older and I'm definitely too young to have some major illnesses although yes in true life indeed, life can be so unpredictable. Like one time you are fit, and another time you are battling for another shot of life.


So I hope you know what has been going in my life lately. Ain't easy I tell you. The thing about life is that you shouldn't get yourself into unnecessary trouble and I have learnt my lesson hard. Sometimes I think that it will not happen to me but it has due to some unforeseen circumstances. 

 
Therefore now I am stuck. I hate to write about my woes but this kind of thing has happened and the only way out is for me to start afresh and slowly push my troubles away. I won't run away from them but I want to make them go away.


I hope things will get better.


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