Okay so Im finally blogging after putting it off night after night coz I was too lazy to stay up after my evening nap. Im happy that me and Mariah finally managed to organize a karaoke session after so freaking long and if things go well (like Sherry not bringing her Taiwan friend along..shall remind her later in the day), we shall have great fun mangling singing oldies and the goodies. Oh, and in my case also, Im gonna hijack all the boyband songs.
Unfortunately, in their next meet up session, I am not able to join them because I cant afford to plonk down part of my savings to buy a ticket to the Singfest. I have a family to feed and I cant just happy happy go have a day of enjoyment and then miserably suffer the next few weeks...sigh. Anyway, Im happy for them because it is after all the event of the year and they get to be there. Mariah cant contain her excitement and Nats is dying to see Alicia Keyes.
So yah at times I do feel upset but what the hey, I'll get over it and Im starting to feel okay about it already. And oh, thanks to my mum's weird advice also like how they are going to be richer and you are going to be poorer and they cant help you if you are broke. I mean this is the same woman who sighs whenever I buy a new blouse (and I hardly ever shop!) despite my reason like this is the sale of the year..blah blah....and they only have such sales twice a year..blah blah. She would say things like my eyes are evil...cannot see things cheap....just have to buy. Either that or she would say just because my friend bought something, doesnt mean I should.
Anyway, no matter how twisted her advice is, her almost comforting words help me to see things in a different light. Just like two days ago, I told her I was upset over some things and then I would normally post her questions like 'why is she like that?'...or 'why are they like that?' and she would say back..'oh some people are like that so just ignore them or play along'..although that is just a gist of it. She would add on to it coz she knows I wont be happily trouncing away with answers like that. She may not always be right but someone has to comfort me.
So Im feeling better and I kinda am trying to resolve some thing right now based on what she would say such as two can play that game. Sometimes, the underlying problem with me is that I tend to think too much or analyse things too much that I get caught up with being a little bit too sensitive although I will recover quickly like in a matter of five minutes. Because I know some people dont mean what they have said or they have forgotten to be a little bit more sensitive to other people's feeling but sometimes it's just unintentional.
Of course the world will be a better place if people think before they say or do first because it makes things less complicated but you know, it's just human nature that at random times, we may have a lapse of better judgment. I often try not to let negative things cloud my thoughts so I guess that's how I developed my sense of quick recovery before I let them take over me for a longer period of time. Because if I do, it will be quite serious and I can sink down in the depths of depression and based on past experience, it is not easy to claw back up again. I took months to recover on two separate occasions and it is really hard to be normal if you are utterly depressed. Everyday just seems so bleak that snapping out of it is not so easy even though in your heart, you want to be all cheery again but the thing is that, it feels as though the whole system in your body has shut down. I compare it to someone in a state of comatose and not being able to open their eyes and wake up even though in their heart, they desperately want to end this nightmare.
So on that note, mum is always right. Ok wait. I beg to differ for that at least for my mum. But mothers being mothers, no matter how nasty or how menopausal she can be at times, only she knows what Im thinking right down to why I didnt buy the packet of biscuits and it's not because I have conveniently forgotten. It makes it hard for me to tell her white lies to save my ass since she will never buy it. I shall then heed her advice by just ignoring it and not pay too much attention to it or just play along. But just so you know, I also get the table turned on me too because at times, my mum thinks that I was the one creating my own problems and it wouldnt be an issue if not for the fact, I didnt let go of it so easily.
Sigh..yes mum.
Unfortunately, in their next meet up session, I am not able to join them because I cant afford to plonk down part of my savings to buy a ticket to the Singfest. I have a family to feed and I cant just happy happy go have a day of enjoyment and then miserably suffer the next few weeks...sigh. Anyway, Im happy for them because it is after all the event of the year and they get to be there. Mariah cant contain her excitement and Nats is dying to see Alicia Keyes.
So yah at times I do feel upset but what the hey, I'll get over it and Im starting to feel okay about it already. And oh, thanks to my mum's weird advice also like how they are going to be richer and you are going to be poorer and they cant help you if you are broke. I mean this is the same woman who sighs whenever I buy a new blouse (and I hardly ever shop!) despite my reason like this is the sale of the year..blah blah....and they only have such sales twice a year..blah blah. She would say things like my eyes are evil...cannot see things cheap....just have to buy. Either that or she would say just because my friend bought something, doesnt mean I should.
Anyway, no matter how twisted her advice is, her almost comforting words help me to see things in a different light. Just like two days ago, I told her I was upset over some things and then I would normally post her questions like 'why is she like that?'...or 'why are they like that?' and she would say back..'oh some people are like that so just ignore them or play along'..although that is just a gist of it. She would add on to it coz she knows I wont be happily trouncing away with answers like that. She may not always be right but someone has to comfort me.
So Im feeling better and I kinda am trying to resolve some thing right now based on what she would say such as two can play that game. Sometimes, the underlying problem with me is that I tend to think too much or analyse things too much that I get caught up with being a little bit too sensitive although I will recover quickly like in a matter of five minutes. Because I know some people dont mean what they have said or they have forgotten to be a little bit more sensitive to other people's feeling but sometimes it's just unintentional.
Of course the world will be a better place if people think before they say or do first because it makes things less complicated but you know, it's just human nature that at random times, we may have a lapse of better judgment. I often try not to let negative things cloud my thoughts so I guess that's how I developed my sense of quick recovery before I let them take over me for a longer period of time. Because if I do, it will be quite serious and I can sink down in the depths of depression and based on past experience, it is not easy to claw back up again. I took months to recover on two separate occasions and it is really hard to be normal if you are utterly depressed. Everyday just seems so bleak that snapping out of it is not so easy even though in your heart, you want to be all cheery again but the thing is that, it feels as though the whole system in your body has shut down. I compare it to someone in a state of comatose and not being able to open their eyes and wake up even though in their heart, they desperately want to end this nightmare.
So on that note, mum is always right. Ok wait. I beg to differ for that at least for my mum. But mothers being mothers, no matter how nasty or how menopausal she can be at times, only she knows what Im thinking right down to why I didnt buy the packet of biscuits and it's not because I have conveniently forgotten. It makes it hard for me to tell her white lies to save my ass since she will never buy it. I shall then heed her advice by just ignoring it and not pay too much attention to it or just play along. But just so you know, I also get the table turned on me too because at times, my mum thinks that I was the one creating my own problems and it wouldnt be an issue if not for the fact, I didnt let go of it so easily.
Sigh..yes mum.
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