Saturday, February 03, 2018

Am I Worthy to Be Noticed?

Recently a guy I used to admire at the gym, who is sorta like a combination of geek + muscles, made a reappearance after a long while early this year. I was really surprised when I saw him because it had been a few months? I don't know..I don't really keep track but it seemed pretty long to me. When I turned my head and saw him in his familiar tall and slightly hunched walk, I was like..'he's back!!!!' in my heart of course, can't say it out loud explicitly.

I guess he noticed me as well. I mean I could be a familiar face since I go there every Sunday for years, though the timing started getting later and later. But oh well, at least I still go, haha. Seriously, he still looks that good, without missing a beat, and if I were to skip gym few months, I shudder at the thought. It's not that I am fit right now but let's say, I would be worse off than I am right now.

But this time he didn't seem to have his 'kakis' or people who know him because he's pretty friendly with the regulars there. I don't know, maybe these people are no longer around or something. I don't know if it's me like I could be delusional or something, I think he has taken a little interest in my presence. 

It's at this point that I feel like I'm not worthy of being noticed because I felt like I look like a sack of potatoes compared to the other fit looking and slimmer girls in the gym. But on the hindsight, I don't think I should be putting myself down because he could be showing interest not because I'm attractive or something, thought that could mean a lot to me, heh..but maybe coz I look slimmer (ok, I'm really delusional) from the last time I saw him or that he's admiring me for my determination to show up every Sunday. 

I believe every girl has her own unique attraction. Sometimes we can't see it for ourselves because it takes other people to notice, whether or not they are of the opposite sex. Like the song from the movie Call Me By Your Name, such is the mystery of love. You won't know who you fall in love with. 

But in this case, I am not saying that he has possibly fallen for me, rather, I shouldn't be putting myself down because I am thinking that I'm not worthy of having my presence acknowledged by him and making friends. After all, if there's anything that we have in common, is that we go to the gym to stay fit and healthy. I know he's a gym buff from his physical appearance and I'm like an overweight girl, haha..but I don't think with us being of different sizes shouldn't exclude us from being friends, am I right? 

I'm hopeful that he will strike up a conversation with me even if it's just a simple hi. I don't know if the power of manifestation is really true because I'm trying to manifest for that to happen. Please someone bring me down from the clouds of fantasy, lol.

Well, at the very least I know that dreams do come true if we believe in them with all our heart and soul ;)

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