In Competition with Ourselves



Gosh I am such a sloth this month but there are times I hustle hard and stay committed. But it's hard. Can I just roll up into a ball like a cat and do nothing and self clean? lol..

What you see above is my journal which I have been faithfully writing so that I can recall the things that I have done and should have done. Overall, it's a process to clear my head and to write down some opinionated pieces based on what I see or read. I have always been writing but it's quite sporadic and this time, decided to dedicate time to journal.

However, things can't change and our lives can't improve if we don't do something about it. Someone I know of, has big dreams, most a little far fetched, but failed to even want to take the small steps right now to improve the current situations. Because in the mind, it keeps thinking, oh I am better than this..but for how long, are you going to be stuck in this stagnant state and rely on people's sympathy.

We are sucked into the world of social media, how people present themselves online, and then we will #goals but we don't know the actual grinding, which is not shown mostly. At times, they do show a sneak peak like this is the number of emails and WhatsApp chat I have to go through or this is the amount of paperwork.

One time, there was this young entrepreneur who just rented a new studio, her third one, and she held promotional classes. She was so busy that she could hardly take a breather in between, like having a proper lunch. She ate out of the tuna can and also ran out of quick meals to eat from 7 eleven. I know how it is like, when you have to grind, and then everything else matters less, including food like a proper meal.

Back to me being a sloth, haha. July whizzed past and can you believe, for the whole of last week, I didn't even bother with night time skincare routine. It is already very very simplified unlike other people's 10 to 12 steps beauty regime. Still, I feel lazy, haha.

But how can I take things for granted. Do I have to wait for a break out or some nasty pimple to come out to learn my lesson. And then at one point, I didn't go to the work gym for about a month. Instead, I spent most of my lunch time listening to my colleague complaining about life in general when I should be working out at least half an hour on the cross trainer. So last week, I decided to put a stop to it. I already told my colleague, but yah..she still tried to carry on the convo..but I guess I was like, I really have to go. It's just like Sunday gym routine where I feel that I am forced to go because my mum would prepare the workout clothes without fail so if I don't go, the guilt is there, haha.

So I am going to treat this skincare routine as a 'have to do' thing as well. I started the routine again. Like me with Spanish. I have been faithfully learning Spanish on the go but it has been awhile since I watched the YouTube videos, relying on short cuts to learn while commuting to and fro from work. But at least I still learn new word and phrases though not enough still, if I want to reach fluency levels.

I am also a little more determined to save aggressively after watching a youtube video a few days ago and how she hustled her way to get out of her current financial situation and being a single mum of two. She watched a video and felt so inspired that she put into practice the things she learnt online so that she can be debt free as well. At the same time, she also wants to save for the future and she does all this with so much determination that she feels liberated when she made the last payment and more secure because compared to her last bank balance which she screenshot a few years ago, she is much better now. But it doesn't mean she has slacked. She still works hard though not as aggressive as before because she has lesser things to be worried financially. So now she works on saving more.

Let us all strive to be a better person than we were yesterday. Instead of whining all the time, and comparing ourselves to others and be all sad about it, we should be in competition with ourselves. We only stand to benefit from it though in the process, let's not forget to take care of our health. For myself, stop being a sloth! haha..


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