Monday, December 21, 2015

Learning to be More Tactful

In life, many of us have good intentions or at least we THINK we have good intentions when we decide to give advice to people who are struggling or need somebody else to tell them things they can't really see in moments of frustration or despair.

Alas, this is not always the case.

There are people who just want to let their problems be known to you but don't need to be told what to do because it's easier said than done. Of course in a way, we think that we are helping them with our suggestions but they may have tried and it hasn't been successful or they just think it's not really possible.

I think that it's best to keep an open mind. Everyone has problems, big or small, and it's a matter of how you face them upfront and learn to deal with them in ways that we can. But being bogged down with too many problems, our mind can get rather clustered with so many thoughts it's understandably hard to think through.

Yet, it's also best for us to put ourselves in their shoes and see it from their perspective. I've made a mistake and even though there were some things that I don't regret saying, I wished I could have been more tactful. When I tried to turn around and made it feel like I was the one facing these problems, I would feel upset with the comments too.

 I still think that I've not said much things that are offensive but you know there are times, people just don't want to listen and they simply want quick solutions and whether you're in it with them or not. The rest, they are not interested. I feel like that they should dig deeper and not rely on these quick fixes but you know, saying nothing is better than saying something for some people.

Because of this, I feel like I'm no longer compelled to say things to them unless they want to. Believe me, I have problems too, go through financial difficulties and so I can somewhat be more sympathetic towards them. However, I do not want to remain in such difficulties and I want them to pull through them like how I am slowly turning my life around but alas, for some people it's not as easy as it seems it is.

Therefore from now on, I shall learn to be more tactful if I feel like I still am lacking in this :(

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