I've been feeling this blues up to last Thursday. I didn't have a good start to November, and I even put on 1kg. I know it's just 1 but for someone who is already on the heavy side, that 1 is a big deal, haha. But sometimes a little prep talk to myself does keep things going though it's not so effective. I could have earned $50 this week through my online orders but I was just too lazy to make them. I was this close to finishing it but I just couldn't finish.
I had a little me time going to the library, as I sat on a bench thinking about what am I doing with my life right now. I was upset with myself because I didn't put in effort in actually living my life. There were some moments which could steer me towards the right direction in life but somehow it didn't resonated well with me, like I still feel as though I just couldn't do something. I just don't have the mood.
But now, I'm slowly easing into routine as I tell myself that I should not feel miserable and upset. I must focus on actually doing something and being in the present state of mind. Giving myself, say half an hour to do a task, and then rewarding myself with using the internet to watch a youtube video, play a handphone game or scroll through the instagram feed. Anything to keep me going.
Of course along the way too, I must learn to be more responsible such as keeping my promise and being up to standard, in terms of my health, finances, online business, writing my blogs and nourishing my soul. I also have been quite lazy with my skincare routine although technically, fitness wise..I still go for the classes. I mean I enjoy them a lot so it's one of those things that I don't need prep talk, lol.
So yes, that's how things are with me currently. In short, I am not at the top of my game but it's ok, for now. Sometimes life can be a little 'meh' but we should not be too carried away and just sleepwalk our life away. I want to be more proactive in life and give meaning to it.
let's do this!
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