Blissed...
why? Coz a small part of my crankiness and moment of boredom has whittled away slowly after the return of some sweet moments. Yes the dramadee of soap opera is back! So it gave me this feel good factor in me yet again. Then, tomorrow's LONG OVERDUE gym workout will hopefully bring in some trigger happy moment in me yet again too. For quite a long while now, I have been drawn to the library which will give me at least 30 min of worry-free moment. Whatever it takes to make me forget about my dark period in life right now, I try to embrace it so long as it does not endanger my life or push me way down the bottomless pit further.
I have currently picked up a book which I have read halfway and then it makes me start to repiece my life back a bit like one big jigsaw puzzle. For now, it will be a long while before it is complete but while that will have to wait, I am just counting on piecing it together again and making sure that it does not get out of place again. I admit that I am like a convenient target for darting life's problems and misery of the world but I can take it and I am going to come out strong, better and wiser. No doubt about it. I learn to be a bit more thick skinned because only one video keep replaying in my mind right now and that is my family.
Nobody has it easy and even beyonce's family, yes that famous lookalike of mine....went through tough times. Her dad wanted her and her posse to make it as singers so much that he and his family came out of their comfort zone, suffered setback after setback, just to help these girls cut a record deal. The stress that they dealt with trying to adjust to their new life was too much to bear that her parents separated as all they ever did was to argue with each other.
But after the girls started to make a name for themselves, and cutting a record deal, they started to taste the sweetness of their sacrifices. Her parents got back together and the family became even more united than ever and their life was much more better than before.
Can you imagine if her dad had not given up that well paying job of his to manage the girls? Well, it was a huge risk because of the sheer number of talented singers in that country and all of them tried to make it big and not many have made it successful. But they did not give up and just gave their all working their butts off and just staying strong after one rejection and another. Even Kelly Clarkson, before she won the famous singing talent show, she had door after door close on her face when she tried to make it as a singer.
Now kelly and beyonce are not much different from me..age wise. But look where they are. Age is nothing but a number (but it still makes no sense to me to date younger guy..hee) and they are now wiser than before after having gone through tough times. They tried to realise their dreams while for me, I just try to make it work for my family. Of course I do wish things would be different and I would be pursuing my studies plus other interests and not having to worry about my family's finances day after day because it bores the heck out of me.
But it's okay. We can only plan but we will never know the outcomes but that doesnt mean we should not stop and think about ourselves. We only have one life to live. It's easier said than done but I suppose it's worth a try to pay more attention about the positive things in our life rather than just thinking about the negative side and also not to give up chasing after that one thing in our life: happiness.
Hopefully, things will look up for me.
why? Coz a small part of my crankiness and moment of boredom has whittled away slowly after the return of some sweet moments. Yes the dramadee of soap opera is back! So it gave me this feel good factor in me yet again. Then, tomorrow's LONG OVERDUE gym workout will hopefully bring in some trigger happy moment in me yet again too. For quite a long while now, I have been drawn to the library which will give me at least 30 min of worry-free moment. Whatever it takes to make me forget about my dark period in life right now, I try to embrace it so long as it does not endanger my life or push me way down the bottomless pit further.
I have currently picked up a book which I have read halfway and then it makes me start to repiece my life back a bit like one big jigsaw puzzle. For now, it will be a long while before it is complete but while that will have to wait, I am just counting on piecing it together again and making sure that it does not get out of place again. I admit that I am like a convenient target for darting life's problems and misery of the world but I can take it and I am going to come out strong, better and wiser. No doubt about it. I learn to be a bit more thick skinned because only one video keep replaying in my mind right now and that is my family.
Nobody has it easy and even beyonce's family, yes that famous lookalike of mine....went through tough times. Her dad wanted her and her posse to make it as singers so much that he and his family came out of their comfort zone, suffered setback after setback, just to help these girls cut a record deal. The stress that they dealt with trying to adjust to their new life was too much to bear that her parents separated as all they ever did was to argue with each other.
But after the girls started to make a name for themselves, and cutting a record deal, they started to taste the sweetness of their sacrifices. Her parents got back together and the family became even more united than ever and their life was much more better than before.
Can you imagine if her dad had not given up that well paying job of his to manage the girls? Well, it was a huge risk because of the sheer number of talented singers in that country and all of them tried to make it big and not many have made it successful. But they did not give up and just gave their all working their butts off and just staying strong after one rejection and another. Even Kelly Clarkson, before she won the famous singing talent show, she had door after door close on her face when she tried to make it as a singer.
Now kelly and beyonce are not much different from me..age wise. But look where they are. Age is nothing but a number (but it still makes no sense to me to date younger guy..hee) and they are now wiser than before after having gone through tough times. They tried to realise their dreams while for me, I just try to make it work for my family. Of course I do wish things would be different and I would be pursuing my studies plus other interests and not having to worry about my family's finances day after day because it bores the heck out of me.
But it's okay. We can only plan but we will never know the outcomes but that doesnt mean we should not stop and think about ourselves. We only have one life to live. It's easier said than done but I suppose it's worth a try to pay more attention about the positive things in our life rather than just thinking about the negative side and also not to give up chasing after that one thing in our life: happiness.
Hopefully, things will look up for me.
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