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Rekindled Past

Hello...


I just try to do a quick update because I don't think I want to spend too much time on it since last Saturday, I did a few entries. Hrm, I just wanted to touch upon how I seem to be visited by my past, which isn't totally a bad thing, unlike some guy with a hook a.k.a the 'I STILL know what you did last summer' freak. Btw, would you believe that there is a THIRD part to it which is 'I ALWAYS know what you did last summer'. Point being..who bloody well cares already?! Jennifer Love Hewitt moved on too. The thing is, sometimes...some parts of my past are better left alone in their pitholes wherever they are because I don't like to be disturbed no more. Don't get me wrong now. I still am in touch with people who have formed part of my past and also my present in case you're wondering if Im some snobbish ungrateful tart who throw away her old friends and make new ones ala Paris Hilton. It's just that....uhm......how do I explain this nicely...I just don't want to revisit or rekindle some old friendships because at one point of time, yes they did leave me an impression. However, that impression is not deep enough that will last me till years later.


For example, someone who was once your friend then totally forget your existence and then suddenly, claim to wanna forge new friendship again. You're either excited or you go 'Oh no..', in which case, I am the latter. She has not quite made the move to meet or what but simply praised me up and down til i don't know what is her motive..whether she is trying to trace old schoolmates or she's just comparing her own mental note of how i looked then and how I looked like now. Whatever it is, the only thing that I thought was very sweet was how she didn't forget our coincidential meeting in 2004 at BK Tampines. I seriously didn't think she would remember because I practically almost ran away when she called my name and I turned but was rather shocked at her appearance. I mean people change for sure but hers was like...uhm...very the striking blue eyes and she was so slim unlike back then in secondary school when she was a little on the pudgy and nerdy side. Wow..and last year, I also remembered this nerdish looking girl from those days who turned into this da-bomb kind of girl walking alone in her office attire with a skirt rather tight and short albeit slowly in CHINATOWN..u know where the chee ko peks are. Okay, I was alone too but I was about to meet my friend and I wasnt sashaying like her.


Yes, so now you know Rahayu fears people especially those people who carry a bit of her past with them. And oh, the other thing which stinks is how people tend to compare you back then and now because it is one of the most natural things to do like how I just did for her even. Whatever it is, I could have just deleted her message on my friendster so I would avoid the risk of a planned meeting with her in the future. But what touched me was what I mentioned about her still remembering that fateful day in BK..yup 'fateful' coz I can be so dramatic...and how she never forgets the friendships which she had forged in the past. So you can say Im simply repaying her kindness and her sweet thoughts.


Talking about the past, going further back into the past is my former best friend whom I had not kept in touch for the longest time. Well, I did promise this is going to be a rather quick update so the quickest one I can pull on her is that she just got married to her long time beau last Saturday. Even though I have not met her for ages, Im still touched that she still remembers me and invited me to join in her history making day. Unfortunately, I was sick with gastric pains so the next best thing I can do is the reception tomorrow with yet another girl from my past till present, a fren from secondary school. See, Im not all that bad. Just uhm..fear of the unknown.

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