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Live to Learn

I am so inclined to talk about work but decided against it but just do a quick recap of what happened. I can only say I dont know what got into parents today...they're like..oh..my...gawd. Making such big hoo-haas like the world revolves around their children only. I can only say that they should look at a bigger picture and school rules are there for a reason. The only thing I am quite upset about is how one parent was going to quote my name, despite me saying that it is best to talk to the teacher about this issue since we are merely following the school rules. But she was so adamant in trying to make me make an exception for her son whose hand was in a cast, which she therefore see no need for him to wear a nametag for his new shirt, that Im like in my heart..'whatever lah..do whatever you want.'

I was so frustrated about it that I didnt manage to take down her particulars because in my head, I was thinking it's not fair that here I am trying so hard to reason out to her but she was like dying to cut the story short by making her son to quote my name if they asked. To me, communication should be two way. When they talked, I listened and shouldnt they do the same to me too instead of constantly cutting me in when I was trying to explain? Some things you dont question ah...like school rules. If we try to bend the rule for one boy, what if other parents ask and want us to make the exception for them too? And if things get out of hand, at the end of it all, are they going to answer for it? Definitely not. It will still fall back on the school.

And then, for all you know, if I try to raise my voice, they would say that I am being rude. So I learned some important things today. If I cannot handle the case, pass it to my admin manager or the discipline master and..AND......very important, take down the particulars. Oh, and NEVER try to make exceptions for any of the parents.

So I have to psyche myself up from tomorrow onwards..'take down the particulars, rahayu...take down the particular, rahayu...never make exceptions..never make exceptions..' Phewh! That's hard work.

Anyway, today I didnt get reprimanded by my manager so another 'Phewh!' for that. And my VP even praised me for the collating of feedback that I had done for her previously. Oh, and my grey haired semi-crush (yes there is such a thing..dont ask.) subject head talked to me! Okay he just took the puncher from my desk and then asked if he could borrow but still! He chose to borrow it from me instead of going to the usual 'stopping point' cubicle behind me! Like I said previously, Im not here to badmouth my colleague because I know she's nice and helpful but if she chooses to get promoted, it's really up to her as long as she doesnt step on me in order to get what she wants.

Back to my semi-crush...heh. Not bad ah, for someone who carries girly bags (three of them, no less) is pretty popular. For one, my colleague likes to disturb him (but she does it to the I.T. assistant as well whose very the geeky sort) and his car, would always have other teachers going with him and I assume he'll drop them somewhere and today, there were like three female teachers who had a lift from him.

And that brings me to another point of the day...Rahayu needs to get a freakin' life! Like maybe for once, like a guy who is WORTH IT! Haiz, it made me out to be such a desperate mamma, I think if a guy in his senior years walked past me, I would assume he's still in his twenties. I want my mojo back!

Kinda tired talking about my work life in school admin. But I think it pretty much helps me to clear the air a bit.

Other bits of my life..well...my dad is STILL not back yet from his sister's house. My mum was like asking me every single day...should I call him and ask when is he returning. But on the other hand, she felt that he is better off there. And then she said she also pitied my brother because at times, if my mum gives him money to buy food, some of it he will use to buy for my brother some snacks like curry puffs or chicken rice which he will eat after he comes back from school.

But now, he comes back expecting something to eat and trust me, he will have this voracious appetite since he doesnt eat in school, and there's nothing for him except a bottled drink which I will buy the evening before after work. So my mum feels a bit sad because she pities my brother. And she also said that she doesnt have money to buy for him food and felt even more sad when she thinks about my brother, at his young age, his father has stopped working. I said why need to be sad, Im still working what..and I still buy for him food and drinks. And my mum keeps quiet and I dont know what is she thinking.

Even though we're not rich and I do struggle to bring him up and support the family too at the same time, acting like a breadwinner, I'd rather suffer than let them suffer. But my mum will say that this is not the way. I cant always try to budget by cutting down on my food expenses because it will affect my health which in turn will affect them as well.

You know, it's not coz Im trying to budget. But sometimes I dont know what Im trying to achieve. When I used to have very little money left, yes it is true I try to budget by not eating so that I am able to buy snacks for them to eat after I finish work. And now when I have just a bit of savings to get by the week, I am torn between trying to keep myself healthy by not eating so much and eating healthily and also trying to maintain the money put aside for the week's expenses. So it's often a battle to me but I try to rectify the matter by swopping real food with oatmeal only on alternate days or two straight days instead of straight three days or more.

So far so good. I have not experienced bad chest pains and when I walk to school every morning like for about 13 minutes or so, I dont feel so breatheless. Next week, I am going to start back my gym and hopefully I will be healthier just so that I can continue to look after my family...apart from losing weight, that is..hehe.

I want thank those who showed their concern to me because I really appreciate it. I really do. Dont worry, I wont disappoint and it may seem that your advice falls on deaf ears, actually it's not. I do take note and will be more careful next time. Life is all about learning right? And that is what I am doing every single day.

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